I am a badass

I am a badass


by Maria on 01 Apr 2017 - 06:31  

I, like many people I know that suffer from Imposter Syndrome, fluctuate from feeling like a fraud and feeling like, maybe okay. Recently, I decided to give Toastmasters a try. Not because I thought it would help with Imposter Syndrome, but because I want to become a better speaker. The first assignment is to talk for five minutes about yourself. This was a revealing task for me, as I had to look at my life and come up with some sort of theme, regarding my life, to talk about. And what I learned is that, I may, in fact, be a badass. I'm trying it on for size, anyway. So, I am posting the script of my talk here, as well as I can remember it, so that when I am feeling like a fraud, I can see evidence that this may not be true.

My Ice Breaker Speech

There is a famous poem by Robert Frost about walking in the woods, and coming to a fork, and possibly taking the path less traveled. This poem has often been misinterpreted, but this is not poetry 101, so we will move on. As I look back over my life so far, it seems that I have taken the advice often ascribed to that poem to the extreme, and have more often than not, chosen the most difficult, arduous, god-awful path I could find, sometimes just making up my own. This seems related to another theme in my life, that I seem to be drawn to "guy things".

Starting about the 3rd grade, I regularly played tackle football with the boys in my neighborhood. I was always the only girl, and yes, I could usually tackle the boys, though most were bigger and older than I.

At the age of 17, I joined the U.S. Army as a truck mechanic, volunteering to go to Korea, and airborne training. I would have volunteered for ranger training, if they had let women then.

After the Army, I went to college. I majored in physics. While a student, I discovered I was pregnant, and decided to become a single mom. I did not let this stop me from applying for, receiving, and accepting a scholarship to study physics at a German University (in German, of course), taking my 9 month old girl with me for a year in Germany.

Soon after I returned, I graduated. While studying physics, I had gradually become more interested in biophysics, and since I did not feel ready for grad school, I tried to figure out how I could earn a living while learning more biophysics. I knocked on doors in the Biophysics and Physiology Dept. at the University of Washington, and eventually found a couple of professors who were willing to take me on as a software developer for them. I had almost no coding experience. I, and I must assume they, assumed I could figure it out as I went. Which is what I did. I learned coding, as well as system administration, and worked in the department for many years.

Life, it seems, sometimes does not believe that your choices are difficult enough, and after I chose to move out from the house I had shared with my long term boyfriend, I soon discovered that I was pregnant. And that my boss was moving to NYC. Once again, I was an unemployed single mom during a recession. As the tech sector started to recover and begin hiring again, it became obvious that it would be nearly impossible for a self-taught, female, software developer to move from academia to industry. I probably don't have to tell you what I decided to do. I returned to academia in order to fill in the gaps in my knowledge, both in software development and career development. I networked, gave a talk, and generally moved way out of my comfort zone. And, a year and a half ago, I was hired by Disney as a Senior Software Engineer.

One thing I have learned is that it is not strictly necessary to always travel alone down forlorn paths. And so, I am happy that all of you are joining me on my latest journey down a well-trod path to become a better speaker.

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Power and Prince


MyLife, MyRamblings

by Maria on 11 Mar 2017 - 23:51  

I was in the US Army in Korea working as a truck mechanic when I was just 18 years old. It was one of the most difficult years of my life. My roommate used to say, I must have looked like an ex-girlfriend of my commander (that he hated). I spent one-third of my tour in Korea on restriction. I was not an angel, by any means, but I was also just a kid, and clearly being made an example of. But, I was also lucky. My roommate befriended me, took me under her wing, and when she had to leave Korea before me, made sure there would be someone else looking out for me after she left. I honestly don't know how I would have survived that year without her. She was my best friend for that year, and I learned so much from her. But, the three most important things that I learned were:

  1. Prince is awesome.
  2. Women have to look out for each other.
  3. There is always someone whose life sucks more than mine.

Aletha never complained about her situation. But I could easily see, that as much as my life sucked while I was in Korea, and it did, Aletha was in a worse position. She had young children that she couldn't see while in she was in Korea, which was a year assignment. I can't even imagine how hard this was for her. This was in the days of no internet, just very expensive long distance phone calls, across many time zones. While in Korea, she realized that she didn't love her husband, that he didn't respect her, and that she was in love with a man she met in Korea, whom she would have to say goodbye forever to, when she left at the end of her tour. Lame.

It is so hard for me to listen to Prince now. It makes me happy, because Prince. And it makes me sad, because he is no longer with us, and it takes me back in time to visit a person I have lost track of, but after decades, still has a big place in my heart. Wherever you are Aletha, I hope you are having a great life, and that you know how much I appreciate you looking out for me all of those years ago. I do my best to pay it forward. :)

I still work in a male-dominated industry (software), and I still try to reach out and help other women. And I still listen to Prince.

Prince On Arsenio Hall

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MyLife, MyRamblings, Tech

by Maria on 28 Feb 2015 - 23:37  

The other day I was at a meetup, and the subject of allies came up. Specifically, how white males can be allies for women and minorities in tech. I was reminded of an incident that happened to me while I was in the Army, and I thought it might be a useful story to a larger audience.

Many years ago, I was a truck mechanic in the Army National Guard. By coincidence, my motor pool was losing its Motor Sergeant at the same time that our unit was being consolidated with another unit. I was next in line to be Motor Sergeant. So, I was taking over at the same time that our motor pool was more than doubling in size, and, of course, the new mechanics were all male, and did not know me. The first weekend was rough. The new guys were clearly reluctant to take orders from me, and things weren't going so well. Weirdly, the next weekend was completely different, and I couldn't figure out what had happened that I had suddenly gained their respect. I was talking to a guy in the motor pool that I had known for years, and mentioned how much better things were going, and I didn't understand what had happened. He was a big, charismatic guy. The kind of guy that people intuitively look up to and respect. He told me he had seen what was going on, and the next time the new guys were hanging out and talking, he had joined their conversation. When my name had come up, he had told them, "Nah, man, she's alright. She knows her shit, and she's cool." And that was literally all it took. One person, alert enough to see that someone was being undermined, simply because of their sex, and stepping up to defend. It would have taken me months to get to that place of respect without him, assuming I ever could have.

That respect, is given by default to members of the majority, but must be earned by someone not seen as already 'in'. There are, of course, exceptions in both directions to this, but I think it is an excellent rule of thumb. It is so much easier and effective for someone of the majority to point out this imbalance, then it is for the person being disrespected, or anyone else in the minority, to do it. This is truly one of the best examples of how allies can help.

If you see someone that you think is not being taken seriously simply because of their race, sex, orientation, or whatever, step up, and say something. A simple, "hey, let's hear her out", can do wonders in making people realize their unconscious biases are showing through. Just asking a question that shows that you are taking her seriously, can make others realize that they may have been overlooking something. 'What did you say? That sounded like a pretty good idea, can you explain it again, I'm not sure everyone heard it."

Pay attention when a woman/minority says something. How are people reacting? Listen, observe, speak up. This is stuff that allies have to look for, because it is very easy to not see it, if you are not in the minority, and especially if you also feel like you are fighting to have your voice heard. (Cause, yeah, life is hard for those in the majority too. Word.) Members of the majority can shout down others, and generally lose no respect from the majority because of it. Women and minorities can lose respect, simply by fighting to have their voice heard. Allies amplifying their voices is absolutely critical to getting more women and minorities to stay in tech.

Some humor, which somehow feels appropriate. XKCD awesomeness.

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Busy, Shmizzy


MyLife, MyRamblings, Tech, Code

by Maria on 21 Oct 2014 - 06:43  

So, last post, I had been told by someone at a user group that I could not become a great programmer working by myself. I really love my job, so I set out to find a way to do exactly that.

As I thought about my predicament, I thought, sheesh there must be hundreds of people just like me at the university in exactly the same pickle, all of us working mostly by ourselves in research labs all over campus, and probably a good percentage of us self-taught. I started poking around the UW website, and was surprised to find no sort of network of developers. So, I started one. In May of this year, I began tying to figure out how to track down fellow developers at the UW, and it turns out this is no easy task. But, as of October there are 87 subscribers, so I'm making progress. If you know any software developers at the UW, please send them to this site:


to subscribe to my mailing list.

We have started having regular meetings as well. It has been a lot of fun. We have been looking at code, and talking about research and software development. I started my list at an opportune time, because others were also feeling there was a void. There is now an organization at the UW called eScience, and they are very interested in improving coding practices in science at the UW. When they found out about our group, they volunteered to help out. Currently they help with organization and bring snacks to our meetings, total win! Additionally, as a community we are receiving many awesome opportunities. For example, in November, I and many others on the list will be attending a Software Carpentry Instructors training.


Which I am really looking forward to. Science and coding, why not do both well? Plus, we get to do this:

09:15: Teaching as a performance art (2)

So we can share the love.

I have been looking for ways for our group to meet on a regular basis to do some live coding, and I am contemplating starting a coding series of sorts. My current idea is that I'd like to take this book:

Head First Design Patterns

By Eric Freeman, Elisabeth Robson, Bert Bates, Kathy Sierra

and go through it as a group. Each time we meet we would talk about one or more patterns, and talk about how it translates into the various languages that people in the group know, and hopefully do some group or pair coding and share it.

So, if you have tried something similar, I'd love to hear how it went! Or if you have ideas of other things that have worked with your group, I'd like to hear that too. Finally, we are always looking for speakers that have experience in the juncture of code and science, especially with incorporating best practices, so feel free to drop me a line if you want to help or come talk!

In addition to this group I have formed, I have just started TAing for an Introductory Python Course, because there is no better way to really learn material, then to teach it!

I don't know if I am becoming a great programmer, but I am learning a lot. Maybe not as quickly as if I were working daily with other developers, but I get to keep my cool job, and still learn more about best practices and about coding from other developers, so I'm pretty sure this is the appropriate response:

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So sue me, I've been busy


MyLife, MyRamblings, Tech, JobHunting

by Maria on 20 Oct 2014 - 06:56  

This is a longish rambling essay, I mean a super interesting essay, explaining why I haven't posted in so long (I've been very busy!), what I've been up to (talking to people, ye gads!), and some advice for job hunting, especially if you aren't currently worried about employment (cause job hunting sucks and you should worry, er I mean, prepare before you're out there!).

I want to tell you a story. A few years ago, I found myself pregnant fairly soon after receiving word that I would be losing my job. The only reason I mention that I was pregnant is because that meant I really couldn't spend much time job hunting before I lost my job, even though I had quite a few months warning. I would be getting decent severance, so I wasn't too panicked. Yes, the economy still sucked, but it was starting to recover, and tech jobs were the first returning. Other people staying in Seattle from my lab had managed to find new employment before my boss moved, which I also took as a good sign. The last time I had been out looking for work was during the dot com bust, and while it had taken a few months, I had more experience this time. So, a few months after my boy was born, my job went away and I received a rude awakening. The job market had changed.

I've already done a rant about tech interviews, so I won't rant about that again. And of course, the job market had changed in quite a few ways in 12 years, but one of the biggest lessons I learned was the importance of networking in today's market, and how when you find yourself unemployed, that is not the ideal time to start networking. We have all heard about how important networking is, but what does that mean? Well, I think the bottom line is, it means getting to know lots of people that are willing to recommend you for a job. Yes, someone you meet once or twice at a networking event may tell you that their company is looking for someone that has your skills, and they may even get your resume in front of the hiring manager, which is definitely a step up from applying through a website, don't get me wrong, but it is not your most likely route to a job. What you really want is for someone who knows you, your work ethic, your personality, and your skills and also know the hiring manager pretty well, to recommend you. Someone you met at a networking event a few times, just can't do that. So, the way to effectively network is to get to know as many people as well as possible. Not just any people, but people that understand the skills needed to do your job, iow people doing your job or a pretty similar one. You need to get to know them as well as possible by talking shop, and a lot of it, and not just about your favorite movie or whatever. You know you have probably reached that with someone when you would be completely comfortable recommending them for a job, so yeah, this takes a while, and if you can do joint projects, all the better. And then, when you are looking for a job, you should personally hit up every one of those connections, and ask them if they have heard of any job openings you may be interested in. And remind them you are looking on a regular basis, but somehow strike that balance of not being a pest, but keeping your name in their thoughts. I'm afraid I don't have much advice on that last one, and I suspect it depends on the person and the method as much as anything.

So now I can finish my story. The reason I had lost my job was because my boss had moved to NYC, and I was unable to move to NYC. After months of hitting total dead-ends looking for work, my old work called me back in to take down some servers that my former boss had left running. Someone new was taking over his old space, so all of his old stuff needed to be taken care of. I went in and dealt with everything, and started to walk out the door. And then I stopped and went back, because I thought, well I should probably introduce myself to the new person and let her know who I was so she could contact me if she found more stuff or had questions about anything. When I went in and introduced myself, she started asking me about what I had done for Mike, my old boss, and it turned out she was in the same boat Mike was, she had moved across the country and left her programmer behind. Neuroscience research with primates is a small field, so of course, she knew Mike, and so Mike's recommendation was valuable, and skills needed for both jobs greatly overlapped. So, when I finally found employment, it was a combination of serendipity and because of someone I knew well. Yeah, n of 1, I know, but, heh, the internet.

So, when I looked back on my 12 years of being a sysadmin and a software dev, I realized that I could pretty much count on one hand the number of other software developers I knew in the Seattle area. So, if I didn't know very many people who could recommend me, and I suck at interviews, it is no wonder I had such a hard time finding a job in the tech market! Why did I know so few other developers? This was for many reasons, but the main one was that I was in academia in a fairly secure job the whole time, and wasn't really thinking enough about life after my current gig. My ways of improving myself had always been books, mailing lists, and classes, which doesn't get you out in the community much. Plus, I had been working as both a sysadmin and a developer, but quite frankly the sysadmin required much more constant learning and tended to hog my learning time, because it involved so many different technologies and programs. I decided during my period of unemployment I wanted to focus on software development, and clearly, if I was going to continue to be a coder and be able to deal with any future unemployment or career moves, I was going to have to change how and what I was learning drastically. And so, the introvert starts the slow task of reaching out.

I started going to various meetups, and other local meetings of coders and learning more about how to become a better developer, figuring it would be good to kill two birds with one stone. And, while it has never been clear to me why I would want to kill two birds with stones, it was abundantly clear why I needed to both network and become a better developer. Since I was a self-taught developer, who had spent all my time in academia, I knew there were some holes in my skills and knowledge. In the meantime, I was really loving my new work at the University, but I was a little worried, because I was once again working by myself in a science lab with a bunch of primarily science researchers who knew a little about coding. One day at an event I was talking to people about becoming a better programmer. They were emphasizing pair coding, code reviews, working in a team, etc. and so I asked how I could improve when I worked by myself. One of the developers I was talking to told me that he didn't think anyone could become a great programmer working by themselves. Not the answer I was looking for.

Next post: How I responded

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Amish Ground Beef and Noodle Casserole


by Maria on 11 Aug 2014 - 04:57  

Haven't posted in quite some time, as I have been very busy, but a tech post is coming up soon. In the meantime, food!

This casserole was pretty awesome. I wish I had been thinking to take a picture. It is basically a slightly less time consuming lasagne. My casserole dish was very full. I didn't cook it the full hour, and that was no problem. Everything was sufficiently cooked going in, it is just a matter of letting the flavors blend as much you want.

I started with this recipe:


which was adapted from a recipe in an apparently fantastic cookbook that Ali Phillips recommends that you buy immediately, New Recipes from Quilt Country: More Food & Folkways from the Amish & Mennonites.

And then I adapted it a bit more. Added garlic, veggies, and spicy sausage, while cutting back the meat total and the dairy total slightly. It is still very rich and very yummy.

   * 1 1/2 cups sour cream (a 16-ounce container - 1/2 cup)
   * 1 1/2 cups small-curd cottage cheese (a 16-ounce container - 1/2 cup)
   * 1/4 cup finely chopped onion
   * 3-4 cloves garlic
   * 2 Tbsp. minced fresh parsley
   * 10 button mushrooms
   * a few handfuls of spinach (could have put in more)
   * 1 bell pepper
   * 1 7- to 8-ounce package medium egg noodles
   * 1 Tbsp. vegetable oil
   * 1 pound lean ground round or well-trimmed chuck
   * 1/2 pound spicy italian sausage
   * 1 6-ounce cans tomato paste
   * 1 small jar pizza sauce, about 14 oz.
   * 1 Tbsp. minced fresh basil, or 1 tsp. dried
   * 1 Tbsp. minced fresh oregano, or 1 tsp. dried
   * 1 tsp. salt
   * 1/2 tsp. coarsely ground black pepper

1. In a small mixing bowl, combine the sour cream, cottage cheese, parsley, and spinach; set aside. In a large saucepan, cook the noodles according to the package directions. Drain and set aside.

2. Heat the oil in a large sauté pan, over medium heat, add onions, garlic, mushrooms and pepper. Cook till the veggies are starting to get tender, but still have some crunch. Set aside in a bowl.

3. Add more oil to the large sauté pan, as necessary, over medium heat, and add the ground beef, stirring now and then until the meat is no longer pink. Drain off all liquid and discard. Stir in the tomato paste, pizza sauce, basil, oregano, salt and pepper and simmer for 5 minutes.

4. Preheat the oven to 325-f degrees. Grease a 9 x 13-inch pan and begin layering as follows: one-third of the meat sauce, one-half of the noodles, one-half of the sour cream mixture, and all of the veggies. Repeat these layers (except no more veggies left) ending with the meat sauce. Bake covered for 1 hour or until the casserole is bubbly. If you would like, remove the cover the last 20 minutes of baking to crunch up the topping a bit. Allow to stand for 15 minutes, then serve.

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Unit Testing with Panda3D


Code, Python, Panda3D

by Maria on 28 Jan 2014 - 01:40  

I've been playing around quite a bit with Panda3D lately. Panda3D is a game engine originally created by the Disney Corp.; it's a framework for 3D rendering and game development for Python and C++ programs. When I was first learning Panda3D, it was not obvious to me how to do unit testing, and I didn't see any documentation about it, so I thought I would share what I have learned. I think there are a few keys, which I will go over briefly, and then share the code.

1. Don't render to screen, but don't use window-type 'none' either. The one bit of advice I could find about unit testing with Panda3D, suggested using window-type none, but if you do this your camera node becomes noneType, so you will probably have to make changes to your code. Instead use window-type offscreen.

2. Use a setUpClass to instantiate your game. Panda3d has a lot of overhead that you don't want to reload every time you run a test.

3. Have a setUp method to re-configure your game to its starting state. Reload any configuration files here, and move players and objects to their starting positions. This way you you are always starting in the same state without having to re-instantiate your game. This does mean that you should separate setting up the game scaffolding from the initial configuration in your game file, but this is a good idea anyway.

4. The only real change you should need to make to your code is including an if __name__ == "__main__": conditional at the end. This will allow you to instantiate the game and start the task manager running automatically if you start the game from the command line, but won't if you import the class as a module.

5. You can step the task manager directly from the test code, allowing you to run the game for just as long or short as you need to, in order to test the logic for that particular test.

So that I don't have to worry about updating the website if I change the code, I'll point you directly to my GitHub repository for the code. Happy testing!


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The Elephant in the Room


MyRamblings, MyLife, Tech, JobHunting

by Maria on 21 Sep 2013 - 06:27  

Elephant, not in a room

For about 13 years, I have worked in a neuroscience lab as a programmer and a sysadmin. The last time I was interviewing for a job, I had to convince my potential employers that I was smart, dedicated, easy to work with, and would get the job done. Fortunately, I'm pretty good at that. I knew very little about how to program, but I convinced my future boss that I had a plan, the dedication, and the smarts, to teach myself how to program, so I was hired as a programmer.

And now I have 13 years experience as a programmer and a system administrator, so theoretically, it should be easier to get a job. Unfortunately, the interview has changed. It is no longer enough to tell the interviewer what I have done, what I can do, and how I work. The amount of information about me that is available to a potential employer is way more than it was 13 years ago. But, this time around, what potential employers really want to know, is can I solve a toy programming problem, while they watch me and evaluate me (or worse, evaluate me over the phone using a shared doc), under more or less a timed condition. These are the worst possible conditions for me to perform under, and this test has nothing to do with how I will perform as an employee. Seriously. It doesn't reflect how well I program or how much I know about programming or what kind of an employee I am.

I understand that everyone gets nervous about interviews. But, clearly, some people do not become as brain dead as I do. I have been working hard to overcome this. I practice as much as I can, but the situation is frustrating. I know that if I continue to practice, I will get better at it, and eventually I will be able to finish an interview without feeling like I can no longer even recite the alphabet. (I find practice interviews help only a little bit, since most of the pressure is missing.) Eventually, with enough time and practice, I'll get lucky, and the interview will consist of questions that don't put me in panic mode. But, why should I have to do this? Why have we settled on this as the process, when it has so little to do with what candidates need to succeed at work? Interestingly, the process favors people who job hop a lot, and therefore get more practice with real interviewing. That, and showoffs.

And why are interviews a particular problem for me?

It isn't the male environment. I've been living in a mostly male world since I started playing tackle football with the neighborhood boys at age 8.

When I was in the Army, I attended a school to learn large diesel truck mechanics. At one point in the school, one of the instructors had me take over the class, because he felt I knew the material better and was a better instructor. As an undergrad, I was fine with teaching the first year physics lab series, even enjoyed it. For years, I taught weight training. Clearly, the problem isn't speaking in front of people.

It is not the white board. As someone who has been in academia for a very long time, I am very intimate with the white board, and even its predecessor, the black board. It is a very useful tool for sharing ideas with others, and I am more than happy to write code on it, if I feel like we are collaborating and/or learning, and not like I am being judged and timed.

It is not the pressure, per se. Pressure I can deal with, and can thrive in. I ran a mail server for years, and there is nothing quite like the pressure of the mail server going down while your colleagues are at an important conference and very dependent on email. This sort of pressure can energize me.

It isn't even that I don't like these sorts of coding problems, I actually do, as long as I'm doing them in my living room in my pajamas for fun.

So, what is it then? I first noticed this problem of my brain shutting down when I was an undergrad in the physics department. I knew the material. I did well on the assignments. And then, I looked at the test and my brain stopped functioning. What was different about physics and auto mechanics? Well, physics is definitely more difficult (unless you're engineering the auto, or troubleshooting the electrical system, and not just replacing the cv boot). But, that certainly can't explain all of it, because I was doing fine on assignments, and even quite a few of the tests, even though I sometimes felt like I was working at half brain capacity. So, it wasn't simply the difficulty of the material.

Instead, I think it was the structure of the testing. In the physics department, the tests were usually designed so that most people wouldn't finish the tests, and so that no one would get a perfect score. They didn't always succeed in their design plan, going in both directions. I remember tests where the mean was 25 out of 100, and I remember tests where a couple of people managed to get perfect scores. But, usually the mean was right around 50%. This was much different from the auto mechanic courses, and quite frankly, different from most of my other college subjects. And it was demoralizing and scary. And it didn't help that instructors often said things like, 'It should be obvious that...', for things I didn't find obvious at all. Fortunately, none of them were patronizing. Oh, wait. And the more I became insecure about my abilities, the more difficult the tests became. I saw this happening, but could not find a way to stop it. I nearly switched majors because of it. I feel the same kind of pressure now in interviews, but there are different factors.

1. As many geeks are, I am an introvert. I have a hard time talking to strangers, especially small talk. I've mostly gotten over this, but when combined with the other three factors, I think it still plays a role.

2. I think before I speak. So, sometimes there are those long pauses that interviewers hate, because they want to know what is going on in your brain. I try to go back, and say this is what I thought of, and why I rejected it, but it is very difficult for me to speak while I am thinking. Weird, I know. Apparently, this is a thing. And, when I realize I have been silent for a while, I get nervous about that, and we start another cycle of brain freeze.

3. I sometimes experience Impostor Syndrome. I am hyper-aware of how much I do not know. I love learning, and am constantly learning and growing, but sometimes the awareness of how much I don't know makes me feel inadequate, hence, an impostor. And admitting that I sometimes experience Impostor Syndrome makes me feel inadequate. Totally kidding, the recursion is not infinite.

4. I do not have formal CS training.

All of this means is that I become particularly terrified during interviews, but NONE of these things has ever had any bearing on my actual work. Impostor Syndrome seems to particularly affect women, and so I have to wonder if it is the confluence of some of these factors: introversion, impostor syndrome and awful tech interviews that discourage geeky women in particular from staying in the tech industry. Of course, it is more complicated than this, but I do believe the interview structure sure can't be helping the numbers of women. If I, and I am stubborn, and I love making my life as difficult as all hell, sometimes wonder if I should bail because of interviews alone, then it must also be a factor for others.

So, what can be done? What is it that employers really need to know about an applicant before they hire them?

1. Will they get the job done? If they don't know something they need to solve the problem, do they know how to figure it out in a reasonable time? Do they know how to google (seriously, this is an art), and regularly use IRC and/or mailing lists? Are they organized, and do they approach problems reasonably systematically? Do they know how to troubleshoot? Are they tenacious? Do they know when to ask a mentor/colleague for help? Are they willing to try new things?

2. Are they reasonably easy to work with?

3. Do they fit in with company culture and the particular team?

Is there anything about the current popular tech interview format that answers these questions?

My best experience with an interview was one in which the interviewer described what the group was working on, and specifically what I would be working on. We discussed ways to move forward on the current project. We discussed existing problems, my ideas on what to do, and their ideas on what to do. We discussed which technologies I had worked with before, how deep my understanding of them was, which ones were new, and how I would get up to speed on the new ones. At the end, I think we both felt pretty comfortable about what we were getting. I understand that sometimes companies don't want to divulge this much information about what they are working on. But, they can certainly say something like, on day 1 when/if you start here, you will be using technologies, A, B, and C. Which of these are you comfortable with, and which do need to get up to speed on? How would you go about getting up to speed? Which combinations of technologies have you used before, and what were the challenges in how they worked together?

Ideas on other ways to understand applicants:

In that interview, we did not sit down and look at any code, but I could imagine sitting down and looking at a bug in some code and discussing how to solve the bug. Since most of a programmers time is spent debugging, refactoring, optimizing, and testing, and often you are dealing with an existing code base, it seems that talking about refactoring and troubleshooting are way better ways to learn how a person thinks, in a way that is relevant to how they will perform on the job. And I do mean talking, not testing their coding ability. In all of the interviews I have had so far, absolutely no one has asked about troubleshooting and refactoring code. Try some pair programming. Have a candidate look at some code and describe to you what they think the code is doing. If the company is sensitive about its code base, maybe they can fork some open source code that is close to a realistic problem they might face, and the interviewer and interviewee could discuss the merits of the code, maybe even hack on it a little, on an actual computer. Yes, if you feel a deep need for the candidate to write some code, at least have them work on a computer, preferably their own, without someone looking over their shoulder. How about some pair programming or or pair troubleshooting so it feels collaborative, and more like what actually working with this person will feel like? Who says you can only discover how someone thinks by talking to them while they are thinking? Why not wait until they are done, and then you can talk about why they made the choices they did, and what other things they thought of and rejected? I have had companies ask me to write sample code, and then bring me in for an interview, and never bring up the sample code at all. That makes no sense to me. Ask them why they made the choices they made, if they have thought of any ways to improve it, etc. Try to help the candidate feel more comfortable, because that is more realistic for how they will work. For coding, stick with computers. Whiteboards are really awesome for discussing concepts, illustrating (literally) what code is doing, and designing, and can be used for these things during interviews, but despite what I said above, they kind of suck for actually writing code.

Recently I was talking to a recruiter at a large company, and he mentioned how this company was going to start offering tech interview classes. Really?!?!?! This is ridiculous. If your interview process is not screening for what you need it to screen for, and if you know there are qualified people out there, that you want to hire, and you find yourself starting to offer them training on how to get through your interview process, then it seems that it is the process that is screwed up, and not all of the qualified applicants who can't seem to jump through your hoops. Think out of the box, employers!

The bottom line is this, if I am treated as if I am an expert, and you are inviting me in to see if I can help you to solve a problem, you are going to get a much better idea of how I work and how I am to work with, than if you give me a random problem to solve and ask me to solve it on the whiteboard while you watch me and your watch.


Other people complaining about tech interviews in interesting ways:

The Elephant in the Room ~ Comments: 2

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More Tries in Python


Code, Python, Tech

by Maria on 13 Sep 2013 - 06:40  

In the previous blog post we tried to figure out what the python code I found on Wikipedia that was supposedly returning an iterator over the items of the Trie was actually doing, and then we sort of ran with that to gain some understanding of Tries, generators, and recursion in Python. And that was great, but in the end we didn't really have anything useful. Our method returned all of the letters in our Trie, one at a time. It seems it would be more useful if it returned all of the words in our tree, so let's try doing that. Since we have a goal, let's create a test so we can tell if we have reached our goal. Here is our test code:

import unittest
from trie import Trie

class TestWords(unittest.TestCase):
    """Tests for function words"""

    def setUp(self):

        self.mytrie = Trie()

    def test_default_case(self):
        """Test words retrieves all words properly from Trie."""
        expected = ['ant','ante','antic','antsy','antse','ban','banana']
        actual = []
        for words in self.mytrie.words():
        print 'actual', actual                                                                                          
        print 'expected', expected                                                                                        

if __name__ == '__main__':

I've made a fairly complicated, but relatively small, Trie, to really give our code a run for our money. And yes, I even made up a word. And, of course, our method fails miserably. So, let's see about getting some words instead of letters.

We know that many of our words have prefixes in common, that is the point of creating a tree like this. So, the general idea is going to be to collect letters and re-use them. To begin, let's just start collecting letters, and spitting out what we have when we reach the end of a word. We can tell if we are at the end of a word by whether there is a node.value.

    def words(self, prefix = []):
        """Return an iterator over the items (words) of the 'Trie'."""
        word = False
        for char, node in self.root.iteritems():
            if node.value:
                yield ''.join(prefix)
            for i in node.words():
                yield i

And, our test fails!

actual ['ant', 'antic', 'anticsy', 'anticsye', 'anticsyee', 'anticsyeeban', 'anticsyeebanana']
expected ['ante', 'antic', 'ant', 'antsy', 'antse', 'banana', 'ban']
FAIL: test_default_case (__main__.TestWords)
Test words retrieves all words properly from Trie.
Traceback (most recent call last):
  File "test_trie.py", line 27, in test_default_case
AssertionError: False is not true

Ran 1 test in 0.001s

FAILED (failures=1)

I have printed out the expected and actual list of words, and we can see immediately what the problem is. We need to figure out how to delete the letters we no longer need. How do we decide when we should delete a letter? Let's take a look at our Trie:

It looks like we will need to delete letters when we come to the end of a word, but only if that letter is at the end of a branch. How will we know? And how many letters will we delete? When we get to the end of the word antsy, we will need to delete just the y, but when we get to the end of the word antse, we will need to delete both the e and the s. (We actually have no way of knowing which branch will be traversed first; since the tree is based on a dictionary, which node it traverses first is random.)

What would be really useful at this point is if we knew at each branch how many words share that prefix. We could certainly figure this out by traversing the tree once, and then using the information when we traverse the tree again to get the words. But, it seems like this might actually be useful information, in and of itself. So, maybe this is something that really should already be available. This is the advantage with playing around with your proposed data structure before production use. We can still go back and add functionality. So, let's put some new code in our add function to keep track of the number of words using a given prefix. The first two methods of our class now look like this:

class Trie:
    def __init__(self):
        self.root = defaultdict(Trie)
        self.value = None
        self.count = 0

    def add(self, s, value):
        """Add the string `s` to the                                                                          
        `Trie` and map it to the given value. Additionally, keep track of
        how many words each node is shared with.

        head, tail = s[0], s[1:]
        cur_node = self.root[head]
        cur_node.count += 1
        if not tail:
            cur_node.value = value
            return  # No further recursion                                                                    
        self.root[head].add(tail, value)

Very simple addition, which is going to make our life much easier. We may also want to create a method that returns the number of words in our tree that share a particular prefix we may be interested in, but for now, let's finish our iterator.

For every letter that we find, we now know how many words use that letter, so if we keep track of how many words we find that are using each letter, we can compare the two. When we reach the end of a word that is also the end of a limb, we need to delete at least to the last branching point, but possibly farther. We traverse A-N-T-E and we have hit an endpoint. The E only has one word associated with it, so we can delete it, but the T has 5 words associated with it, so we need to check if we have finished 5 words yet. We can't just keep one running tally of words finished, because sometimes we will be keeping track of multiple branching points. For example, we need 5 words for the T, but only 2 for the S, but can be working on completing both of those branches at the same time. Clearly, we need to keep a list of words finished for each letter. We start at the A, we have finished no words, [0], continue to the N, [0, 0], and now to the T, [0, 0, 0], but now we have finished a word, so we go back and add 1 to everything [1, 1, 1]. Let's go to the E, we have [1, 1, 1, 0], and once again we have finished a word, so we now have [2, 2, 2, 1]. We are now at the end of a limb, so we delete letters.

But, wait, how did we know we are at the end of a limb? Well, we know we are at the end of a word, since we can check to see if there is a value associated with it. And if we check the node.count at this point, we can see that this letter is associated with just one word, so we must be at the end of a limb. Great, we can delete letters. How many? We have to check. We delete the E, then check the T. The T has 5 words associated with it, but we have only 2 recorded for the T, so we can't delete it yet. We are done deleting, as no earlier letters can possibly be ready for deleting yet. Now we go to the I, but wait, our letters-visited-list is [2, 2, 2, 1]. Hmm, looks like we need to remember to delete the 1 at the same time that we delete the letter. Makes sense, as this list should correspond to our prefix list. We are at [2, 2, 2, 0] now. We go to the C, and we are at the end of another word, so the array becomes [3, 3, 3, 1, 1]. We check our node.count, and it is 1, so we are at the end of a limb. Delete letters at the end of our array until we get back to the T, which is still a 5, and we are only at 3. Great, seem to have the hang of this. But, we have now checked the T twice, and you may remember that we are not actually going to have access to that node when we backing out. You can tell this is true, because when we were getting the letters, and not deleting any of them, we did not see multiple T's. The final word was 'anticsyeebanana', so the algorithm was just tacking on more endings, and not re-visiting previous letters.

What would make more sense anyway is to keep an array of the nodes we have visited, and what their corresponding word counts should be. So, that list would now look like [5, 5, 5, 1, 1]. Now we just compare the arrays and when numbers are equal, get rid of those letters. Well, we still must only check when we are at the end of a limb. But, this seems a little over-complicated too. What if we just collected the word count array from the nodes, and subtracted 1 from the whole array whenever we hit the end of a word? Any letters currently in the array would be ones that this word would be a part of, since it is just a representation of the letters in the prefix array. Any zeros would represent the letters (and positions in the word count array) we need to delete. Let's try it.

    def words(self, path = [], prefix = []):
        """Return an iterator over the words of the 'Trie'."""
        for char, node in self.root.iteritems():

            # if there is a node.value, then we are at the end of a word and
            # we should yield the word and subtract 1 (word!) from the
            #  entire node path
            if node.value:
                yield ''.join(prefix)        
                for x,y in enumerate(path):
                        path[x] = y - 1

            # if we are at the end of a word and the count is 1,
            # we are at the end of a branch, and it is time to
            # delete letters back to the last branch we haven't
            # gone down yet.
            if node.value and node.count == 1:
                    for j in range(path.count(0)):
                        del path[-1]
                        del prefix[-1]

            for i in node.words():
                yield i

And, let's run our test.

actual ['ant', 'antic', 'antsy', 'antse', 'ante', 'ban', 'banana']
expected ['ante', 'antic', 'ant', 'antsy', 'antse', 'banana', 'ban']
Ran 1 test in 0.000s


Left the print statements so you could see the words. So, at this point, we should create a bunch more tests to check more edge cases.

Do you suppose this is what the author was trying to do with the code in the Wikipedia article? Is there any way to do this without including the node.count or checking the tree twice?

You can find my code on GitHub.

Finally, here is a nice post about how Tries are useful for word storage for computer versions of Boggle, without ever mentioning the word Boggle.

More Tries in Python ~ Comments: 0

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Python: Recursion, Generators and Tries


Code, Python, Tech

by Maria on 05 Sep 2013 - 04:25  

I was learning about Tries, and writing some code to do fun stuff with them, and along the way I ran into some code on Wikipedia that seems faulty, and also came up with a silly way to explain recursion. So, I thought I'd share.

First the silly explanation of recursion:

Let's say you have this wooden sign, but somehow the letters were put on the sign backwards, so your 'welcome' sign says 'emoclew'. So, you put it in your magic box. The box has boxes inside boxes, each with one door leading to the next inner box, kind of like a russian doll with doors. The magic part is that the inner boxes and doors only appear when you feed in a piece of wood with at least one letter on it. The sign goes through the first door, and the first letter (e) is cut off and set aside, and the rest of the sign continues to go through doors. Each time a letter is cut off, set by the door, and another door magically appears, until there is just one letter on your piece of wood. At this point no more doors appear, and the wood is sent back through the door(s) it came in. Each time it goes out of a door, the letter from that box is put back on the piece of wood, but now to the other side of the piece of wood. So as it goes back through the doors it looks like this: 'w' -> 'we' -> 'wel' -> 'welc', etc., until it pops out of the last door, and you have your sign the way you want it. Or, you could just repaint he sign. ;-)

This is pretty much how recursion works. The important bit is that the data is processed both on the way in and on the way out, and each step does exactly the same thing. This is how that code looks:

def reverse(s):
    if s == "":
        return s
        return reverse(s[1:]) + s[0]


The first time it goes in, there is a string there, so it goes to the else statement and runs reverse('moclew') + 'e'. The 'e' just hangs around by the door waiting for the return to be completed, while the 'moclew' goes through the next door. Same thing with the next run, the 'm' hangs out by the door, while the 'oclew' goes through the next door. Once we get to the last letter, no new door appears, instead our 'w' gets kicked out. This is the 'return s' line. But, we still have to go back out the doors we went through, so at the next door, we hit our return reverse(s[1:]) + s[0]. s[1:] at this point we have 'w' ('reverse(s[1:]) from the last door plus the 'e' (s[0]) we left hanging out, so we add them together. Going back through the next door, the reverse(s[1:]) is now 'we' and we add the 'l', continuing until we once more have our welcome sign, letters correctly written.

Now things get weird (and very useful) when we get multiple inner magic boxes. Let's say instead of our single word, we have a word tree. This time we aren't reversing the letters, just collecting them to find out what all words we have in our tree.

  C R
 K   E

Wouldn't it be great, if we could find all the words at once? This is basically what recursion can do. We send our tree in to our magic box. It collects the first letter, sends the tree through the next door, gets the second letter, sends the rest of the tree through the next door, but now finds two letters where it normally finds one. So, open two doors, and send each remaining tree through its own door, simultaneously! You can see how this should be faster than a for loop that would go through each branch one at a time. Recursion is most useful when you have data in tree format, such as directory structures, classification hierarchies, organization charts, etc. Or, if you are trying to do a flood fill. For an awesome explanation of the flood fill algorithm (with cats and zombies!) see the invent with python blog. There are, of course, times when recursion is not the best solution, such as calculating the nth Fibonacci number.

Great, now we are ready to look at Tries and the actual code to do this, and along the way introduce generators.

I was trying to understand Tries (aka Prefix Trees), and started playing around with the Python code on the Wikipedia entry for Tries. (You should probably go ahead and look at the whole article if you aren't sure what Tries are.) One of the last methods for Trie class in that code is items, which claims it returns an iterator.

def items(self):
    """Return an iterator over the items of the `Trie`."""
    for char, node in self.root.iteritems():
        if node.value is None:
            yield node.items
            yield node

So first let's see if we can figure out what this code is doing. Notice the yield statements. The yield statements indicate this is a generator. A yield statement is similar to a return statement, in that it sends the contents of whatever it is yielding to the calling function, but there is an important difference. As the name implies, it is only temporarily handing control over to the calling function. The generator is an object capable of creating and returning its members one at a time, because it is able to remember where it is when control is returned to it. It's purpose in life is iteration. If you have no idea what an iterable is, there is a great post on iterables here. This all may seem a bit fuzzy, but I hope by diving into this code some more, it will become clear.

So, this code seems to be creating a generator that spits out the node items of our tree. That sounds right. We know from looking at the other methods in our class Trie, that node.value is None until we come to an end of a word. So, maybe it spits out letters until it gets to the end of the word, and then moves to the next node? How would that happen? Hmm, this isn't sounding quite right...

And, when I started playing around with this method, I found it did not return what I expected or wanted. I wrote a little code snippet to test the items method. To start with I just added 2 entirely different words to my Trie. Here is a graphical representation of my tree:

And here is my little script:

$ from trie import Trie
$ mytrie = Trie()
$ mytrie.add('terror',1)
$ mytrie.add('plant',2)
$ for letters in mytrie.items():
$    print 'letters', letters 

I thought this would give me back all of the letters in my tree, but instead I got the following:

letters <bound method Trie.items of <wiki_trie.Trie instance at 0x1101921b8>>
letters <bound method Trie.items of <wiki_trie.Trie instance at 0x11018eef0>>

Certainly not the letters I expected. So, what is going on here? Well, the first problem is that we seem to be yielding the wrong thing, if we want letters. It seems to be yielding the method itself. Well, yes, that is exactly what it is doing. What do you even do with that? Some sort of twisted recursion? Hmm, well no surprise that the char in the iterator is the letter, so let's try yielding that instead. But it turns out, that if we yield char, we only get a letter 't' and letter 'p'. Why aren't we getting all of our tree?

So, our tree is made of up to 26 nodes at each level (assuming we are just allowing the lower case alphabet). In our example, we are using 2 nodes at the top level, 't' for 'terror' and 'p' for 'plant'. So, it looks like our code is iterating through those two nodes and stopping, and now we have to figure out how to get it to iterate through each of the child nodes as well. So, how do we do that? Recursion! Remember how I mentioned that recursion is useful for tree traversal? So, what happens if we iterate over node.items()*? Let's change our method, and for now, let's just print what we get:

* Note the parentheses that were missing in the original code on Wikipedia - we are now calling the function, not yielding the name. And no, yielding the call would not have been any more useful than yielding the name, or at least I could not find a use for it...

1    def items(self):
2        """Return an iterator over the items of the `Trie`."""
3        for char, node in self.root.iteritems():
4            # node.value is none when not at end of word
5            if node.value is None:
6                yield char
7                for i in node.items():
8                    print 'i',i
9            else:
10                yield char

And, rerunning my little test script, I get:

$ python test_trie.py
letters p
i l
i a
i n
i t
letters t
i e
i r
i r
i o
i r

Aha! So, now we yield this, and we are in business. A quick note about yield vs. return. With yield, you are not waiting until the function exits to return your variable. Using the box analogy, you are not waiting for the block of wood to go through all its boxes and come back again. You are yeilding your variable as soon as you are done with initial computations and hit yield, but remembering where you are, because you do expect to see the block of wood again. This means that, just like above where the i prints right away, you will get your letters one at a time as they are found.

We change our code again to this:

1 def items(self):
2      """Return an iterator over the items of the `Trie`."""
3      for char, node in self.root.iteritems():
4          # node.value is none when not at end of word
5          if node.value is None:
6              yield char
7               for i in node.items():
8                   yield i
9          else:                                                                              
10                yield char

And we get our letters!

letters p
letters l
letters a
letters n
letters t
letters t
letters e
letters r
letters r
letters o
letters r

Note that Python 3.3 added the syntax yield from X, as proposed in PEP 380, which simplifies our inner loop. With it you can do this instead:

yield from node.items()

But, what is going on in this code? It was straight-forward when we had the print statement, but now we have recursion in a generator. We had to make it a yield statement, because we can't have a return statement in a generator, but that does make things weird. So, now what is actually happening here?

Let's step through our loop. In our test code, we enter our loop and call our method to get the first letter. Node.value is none, so it yields char, and yields control back to our test loop. Our test loop prints 'letters' and the letter yielded. Now we go to the next 'letters in mytrie.items()' in the test loop again. This is the point where if we hadn't have added that inner loop, we would just continue to loop through that top h-node. Instead, something happens that may be a little unexpected. When we return to our method, we return to the same place we left; we do not go back to the beginning again, and this time this has consequences. This is something that is often glossed over when generators and yield statements are introduced. It is not just the variables that are preserved, but the position in the function as well. In the box analogy, perhaps when you return to the previous room (function call), instead of magically appearing at the exit door, you have to continue down a hallway to get to the exit. And maybe you have to pull a lever or something else before you leave.

When we left our items method, we had just yielded char on line 6, so now ask if there is a node.value (yes), and we enter our 'for i in node.items()' loop (I'll just call it the i-node loop). But, wait, node.items() is calling our method again (we hit recursion!), so now we do go back to the beginning of our method, and we continue until we hit our next yield statement, yield char again. Now yield char is an 'l', since we have iterated forward one, while still in our method. But, this yield is to the recursive call, so now control is returned to our i-node loop. Our i-node loop just has another yield, so now we yield again to the test loop, and print our 'l'. Okay, let's do another loop. We make our call from the test loop, and go back to our function, but where? The last yield statement was in the i-loop, so that is where we return, but that loop is now completed, so we go back to the next to last place we yielded, right after the yield char. That is followed by the i-node loop, where we finally get to create a new generator, and advance to the next letter. Every time through, we will create a new generator, and have to back out of that many more yields. While this is happening, Python is returning to the stacks it created in previous calls to create the current stack. This may sound inefficient, but that is because we are only going down one branch at the moment. As soon as we have to back partway out, and go down a new branch, it becomes more obvious why it is good to keep the old stacks around, backing out of yield calls to figure out which stack is relevant.

It is worth noting, that if this were ordinary recursion, it would not have worked. The first loop in our function is yielding char. If it were returning char, the inner loop could not advance, because it needs to know both what the last i was, and what node.items is in order to advance. In a normal recursive call, it would not have access to this information, since these variables are not being returned.

In our example of recursion with the magic boxes, we left a variable by the door, and picked it up on our way back out. The only reason we were able to do this is because that variable was in the return statement. In a normal function, once you leave the function (even to go into the next call of the same function), you lose any other information from that function, except what is in the return statement. But, in a yield statement, you return to the same place in the function, with all of the information you had when you were in the function before. And, if there is code after the yield statement, it will run that code, as if it had never left the function.

To see that the code continues after a yield, you could put the if statement:

 if node.value:
    print "end of word", node.value

after the i-node loop. It will print the end of word, as if it is finding the end of the word as it exits that node on its way back up the tree, as shown here:

maria@lamia:~/python/test$ python test_trie.py
('letters', 'a')
('letters', 'n')
('letters', 't')
('letters', 'i')
('letters', 'c')
end of word 2
end of word 1

for words ant (1) and antic (2)

Switch the order, and now suddenly the world makes sense...

$ python test_trie.py
('letters', 'a')
('letters', 'n')
('letters', 't')
end of word 1
('letters', 'i')
('letters', 'c')
end of word 2

Let's think about our data a minute. I think the graphic on the Wikipedia site is a bit misleading. I think there should be lines drawn horizontally between nodes in the same branch, because it is possible, and necessary, to travel between nodes at the same level in the same branch. Like so:

When we ask for the "next item" using the items method in the case of no recursion, it gives us the next node at that level. But if we are inside our method, and ask for the next node (recursion), we are essentially in a node and asking for the next node of that particular branch. So, in the drawing above, if you are in the "A" node, and ask for the next node, then you get "N" as that is the next node under "A". But if you are not in the "A" node, then the next node is "B". When you get down to the "T" node, you will get an "E", "I" or "S" when you use recursion. But, if you are yielded the "I" and ask for the next letter without recursion, you will get the "S". This will happen when you are moving from one branch to the next, because the method will back out of all of the recursive calls, and then go to the next item, which will be the head of the next branch. There it will hit recursion again, and descend down the next branch. Note that our code is not going down branches simultaneously at this point. This is because we do not have a call to split the recursion to go down the separate branches at once. When it hits a branch, it just goes down the first one it finds. We can consider this in a future post.

Okay, that's quite a bit for one post. Next post, let's try to expand our items function to be more useful.

Many thanks to the Seattle Python Interest Group for helping me sort this all out!

Python: Recursion, Generators and Tries ~ Comments: 0

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by Maria on 26 Jun 2013 - 20:08  

I read a bunch of these here, and decided to make a list of some of my favorites (plus some from elsewhere), so I can always find a good joke:

  • It's hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally.
  • I'd tell you a UDP joke, but you may not get it; or I could tell you a joke about TCP, but I'd have to keep repeating it until you got it, so I prefer IP jokes; it's all in the delivery.
  • Werner Heisenberg, Kurt Gödel, and Noam Chomsky walk into a bar. Heisenberg turns to the other two and says, "Clearly this is a joke, but how can we figure out if it's funny or not?" Gödel replies, "We can't know that because we're inside the joke." Chomsky says, "Of course it's funny. You're just telling it wrong."
  • Pavlov is sitting at a pub enjoying a pint, the phone rings and he jumps up shouting "oh shit, I forgot to feed the dog!"
  • A physicist, a mathematician and an engineer stay in a hotel. The engineer is awakened by a smell and gets up to check it. He finds a fire in the hallway, sees a nearby fire extinguisher and after extinguishing it, goes back to bed. Later that night, the physicist gets up, again because of the smell of fire. He quickly gets up and sees the fire in the hallway. After calculating air pressure, flame temperature and humidity as well as distance to the fire and projected trajectory, he extinguishes the fire with the least amount of fluid.
    Possible Endings:

At last, the mathematician awakes, only again to find a fire in the hallway. He instantly sees the extinguisher and thinks, "A solution exists!", and heads back into his room.

Then the mathematician awakens, and finds that the embers of the fire are still burning. After giving much thought to the problem, he gets up re-ignites it to an actual fire. Then he goes back to sleep, satisfied that the problem has been reduced to a previously solved one.

The mathematician awakens, and finds another fire in the hallway. He looks out the door, then goes back to bed. The house ends up burning down, but the physicist and engineer manage to save the mathematician. When asked why he didn't put out the fire, he says: "I saw the fire, I saw the extinguisher, the solution was trivial."

The punchline has been left as an exercise for the reader.

  • Entropy isn't what it used to be
  • The programmer's wife tells him: "Run to the store and pick up a loaf of bread. If they have eggs, get a dozen." The programmer comes home with 12 loaves of bread.
  • I didn't originally write this one down, but the explanation on Slate was hilarious:
    • From user DrColdReality: “Two women walk into a bar and talk about the Bechdel test.”
    • Why it’s funny: Because “Bechdel test” is actually the name of a guy the first woman is dating.
  • Einstein, Newton and Pascal are playing hide and seek. Einstein closes his eyes and counts to 100. Pascal runs off and hides. Netwon draws a one meter by one meter square on the ground in front of Einstein, and stands in the middle of it. Einstein opens his eyes, and sees Newton immediately, exclaiming, "Newton, I found you! You're it!" Newton smiles and says, "You didn't find Newton, you found a Newton over a square meter. You found Pascal!"
  • A photon checks into a hotel and the porter asks him if he has any luggage. The photon replies: “No, I’m travelling light.”
  • How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb? A fish.
  • Never trust an atom. They make up everything.
  • The barman says: “We don’t serve faster-than-light particles here.” A tachyon enters a bar.
  • Did you hear about the jurisprudence fetishist? He got off on a technicality.
  • An infinite number of mathematicians walk into a bar. The bartender says: “What’ll it be, boys?” The first mathematician: “I’ll have one half of a beer.” The second mathematician: “I’ll have one quarter of a beer.” The third mathematician: “I’ll have one eight of a beer.” The fourth mathematician: “I’ll have one sixteenth of a…” The bartender interrupts: “Know your limits, boys” as he pours out a single beer.
  • What does the “B” in Benoit B Mandelbrot stand for? Answer: Benoit B Mandelbrot.
  • What do you call two crows on a branch? Attempted murder.
  • Jean-Paul Sartre is sitting at a French café, revising his draft of Being and Nothingness. He says to the waitress: “I’d like a cup of coffee, please, with no cream.” The waitress replies: “I’m sorry, Monsieur, but we’re out of cream. How about with no milk?”
  • What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

If you hear any more good ones, let me know!

Jokes ~ Comments: 5

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Python and Mac OS


Tech, Code, Python, Mac

by Maria on 17 Jun 2013 - 23:51  

Mac comes with Python, but it is slightly out of date, and Apple has made changes that may become problematic. We could just install Python directly using the Mac install, but installing additional packages becomes problematic, because this is generally done on the command line, and the Python available from the command line is the system Python, not the one you installed in the Applications folder. Additionally, when you are creating a new project, it is helpful to know what additional packages are necessary for that particular project. Homebrew and Virtual Environments gives you a nice solution to these problems.

We will use Homebrew to install Python and some other utilities. You can even install both Python 2 and Python 3. Python will refer to Python 2, and python3 will start Python 3. Homebrew is a package manager, and will not only install stuff, but keep track of what is installed, and allow us to upgrade and uninstall easily.

Then we will use virtualenvwrapper to set up our project. Virtualenvwrapper sets up a virtual environment that allows you to decide what additional module you want to use for your project. For stuff already installed, it actually creates a link, rather than re-installing the same modules over and over. So, it isn't going to fill your hard drive, but lets you isolate what you are using for a particular project.

To get started, open a terminal and run this to install Homebrew:

$ruby -e "$(curl -fsSL https://raw.github.com/mxcl/homebrew/go)"

If you don't have your path set yet for /usr/local/bin (probably you do), do that now by adding the following to your path (.bashrc) and restarting your shell.

export PATH=/usr/local/bin:$PATH

Python actually comes with its own package manager, which allows you to install additional Python packages. You will still use Homebrew for other packages that you may want. Don't worry too much about using the two package managers. Homebrew knows about pip and its installations and they play nicely together. If a package doesn't install with pip, try brew, maybe it wasn't really a Python package. For more information about Homebrew and Python, see here.

Now we want to install Python and some other packages. Here is a list of packages that I generally find useful. It is a good idea to always update brew before installing or updating other packages

$brew update
$brew install python
$brew install nose # necessary for testing
$brew install gfortran # necessary for numpy/scipy
$brew install numpy
$brew install scipy
$brew install pillow # this will install the Python Image Library PIL
$brew install wxmac # very nice for making Python GUI applications that port to 
 Windows, Mac and LInux. [[http://www.wxwidgets.org/]]
$pip install ipython # interactive python - bash in python! As well as other good  
 stuff... [[http://pyvideo.org/video/640/ipython-python-at-your-fingertips]]
$pip install matplotlib # make graphs! 

Virtualenvwrapper is just virtualenv with a wrapper around it. The wrapper provides some nice utilities to use the virtualenv. Use pip to install both:

$pip install virtualenv
$pip install virtualenvwrapper

After installing, add to .bashrc:

export WORKON_HOME=$HOME/.virtualenvs
source /usr/local/bin/virtualenvwrapper.sh

You will need to reload bash, easiest to exit your terminal and start a new one. Useful virtual environment commands:

$mkvirtualenv test#Creates a virtual envirornment for project test
$lsvirtualenv#See what virtual environments you have
$workon test#Enter a previously created virtual environment
$deactivate#Exit virtual environment (use system python again)

more at the virtualenvwwapper website.

Now when you want to work on a project you have created a virtual environment for, you just type workon and you will see a list of possible projects (or just workon test to work on project test).

So, now what? Well let's say we want to work on a Django project, we could do this:

$mkdir testproject
$cd testproject
$mkvirtualenv testproject
New python executable in testproject/bin/python2.7
Also creating executable in testproject/bin/python
Installing setuptools............done.
Installing pip...............done. 

We see that some things were automatically installed in our virtual environment, basically enough to install the stuff we need. Now while still in our virtual environment, let's install Django, and start our project.

$pip install django
$django-admin.py startproject testproject
$git init
$git add .
$git commit -a -m 'Initial commit of testproject' 

What's all that git stuff? Git is version control software. Contrary to popular belief, you do not need a Github account to use Git. More information about Git and Version Control can be found here.

Okay, now we have the very beginnings of our new Django project. Next time we want to work on it, we just do:

$workon myproject

and we are on our way! If we want to see what packages we are using with our project, just use lssitepackages, while in our virtual environment. You can use this to create your requirements file so that your project will be easy to use or develop on anther machine or platform.

Python and Mac OS ~ Comments: 0

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Mail Server


SysAdmin, Linux, Tech

by on 05 May 2013 - 00:44  

Notes from when I set up a mail server, cause you never know when notes like this will come in handy...

First a lesson about mail servers. A mail server is a combination of a bunch of software working together. The two main parts are the email server itself, for which I use postfix, and the imap server (or pop server), for which I use cyrus. Postfix sends and receives mail, and cyrus sorts and stores the mail. And then there are other pieces, depending on what you want to do. I use a combination of Amavisd-new, SpamAssassin, Razor, DCC, Pyzor and ClamAV for spam/virus filtering. I use Squirrelmail (I have actually since started using RoundCube, which I think has a nicer interface, and some users have found is less buggy) as a web interface to the mail server, doing basically the same thing that Outlook, Mozilla Mail, or Thunderbird do on your local machine, but it does it on the server through a web interface. Obviously, you also need a web server for that, which I am already running for our web pages. I use Apache. I have also set up Mailman for our mailing lists. For security, I use Openldap as the authentication system, and certificates, which is a whole 'nother topic.

Notes from setting up new mail server.

I made a special mail account named test. I am having all spam that gets a score greater than 10 + mails with banned contents or viruses sent to this account. This account has weekly rotation set up. Mail in this account is deleted after 4 weeks. Made a python script to rotate the spam and delete.

Tested getting rid of mail older than 20 days in user test using ipurge. Have to use -f option, but this also means it checks all folders under level requested, and if you are cleaning the inbox, this is all folders, so be careful! Must do as user cyrus if doing from command line: /usr/sbin/ipurge -d 20 -f user.test Worked fine, so added this to cyrus.conf in Events section:

purgetrash cmd="/usr/sbin/ipurge -f -d 14 *.Trash" at=0301

Which purges all messages older than 14 days, in all users' Trash folders and runs every morning at 3:01am. See the man pages for ipurge and cyrus.conf for more details.

mail set up based on:
+ cyrus instead of outside mail delivery
software needed to be configured for mail/web server:

  • backup - bacula
  • web:
    • apache
    • munin
      • /var/lib/munin
      • /var/log/munin
      • /var/run/munin
    • webalizer
    • squirrelmail
    • pmwiki
  • mail:
    • postfix
    • cyrus
      • to change logging for cyrus: /etc/default/cyrus2.2/
    • spam stuff:
      • amavisd-new
      • pyzor
      • razor
      • spamassassin
      • DCC
      • clamav
    • mailman - mailman is a pain moving from one machine to another, be careful of these directories:
      • /var/lib/mailman/archives /var/lib/mailman/data /var/lib/mailman/logs /var/lib/mailman/lists /var/lib/mailman/archives
  • security
    • denyhosts
  • dns server
    • bind
  • ldap
    • configure to use ldap server

good to know:

  • dealing with aliases: If you change the alias database, run newaliases
  • to deal with modules in apache use a2enmod module and a2dismod module

tweaking settings: If you want to configure your system to use more instances of amavisd-new, allocate at least 60MB for each additional instance. It you wanted to double the number of child processes from 2 to 4, you would edit amavisd.conf and change: $max_servers = 2; to $max_servers = 4; Then edit master.cf and change: smtp-amavis unix - - - - 2 smtp to smtp-amavis unix - - - - 4 smtp

Amavisd-new (SpamAssassin actually) will be the biggest bottleneck in the system. On a busy server you will probably want 2GB RAM so you can accommodate somewhere around 12 $max_servers.

If you run sa-learn --force-expire or spamassassin --lint -D or other spamassassin commands from the root account, SpamAssassin may change the owner of the Bayes files to 'root'. If it does, amavis will no longer be able to read those files. You would need to run chown -R amavis:amavis /var/lib/amavis to regain ownership. In general, if you do any spamassassin maintenance from the command prompt as root, the best thing to do is run chown -R amavis:amavis /var/lib/amavis afterwards; just to make sure. You can avoid these problems by remembering to run spamassassin commands as the amavis user. For example su amavis -c 'sa-learn --sync --force-expire'

This script does have some entries that are dependent on the version of SA. If you are not running SA 3.2.5, the script may need to be edited, and you must remember to edit this file when a new version of SA comes out: vi /usr/sbin/sa-update.sh

Notice the lines that may need to be changed. Change 3.002005 if needed (3.3.0 might be 3.003000 for example):
rm -f /var/lib/spamassassin/3.002005/saupdates_openprotect_com/70_sare_whitelist_spf.cf
rm -f /var/lib/spamassassin/3.002005/saupdates_openprotect_com/70_sare_stocks.cf
rm -f /var/lib/spamassassin/3.002005/saupdates_openprotect_com/loadplugins.pre

Exit (or save) the file and run the script: sa-update.sh

Bind: using jail now
munin: can change munin frequency in /etc/cron.d/munin,


testing and how-to stuff:

This excludes much the server says back to you...

server1:~# telnet 25
Connected to localhost.
Escape character is '^]'.
220 server1.example.com ESMTP Postfix (Debian/GNU)
ehlo localhost
250-SIZE 10240000
250 DSN
mail from:<sally@example.com>
rcpt to:<john@example.com>
Hi John,

just wanted to drop you a note.

look at log file for postfix sending. This should not involve spam filtering. spam filtering is only through mail.shadlen.org (14) not actually sure about port 25 on mail.shadlen.org check to inbox


At the bottom of the above link are also hints about dealing with logfiles and backing up config files.

spamassassin -t < message.eml

to see more infos (what SA is actually doing)

spamassassin -D -t < message.eml

check website check squirrel mail

Mail Server ~ Comments: 0

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PyCon 2013


Python, Code, MyRamblings, Tech

by maria on 29 Mar 2013 - 05:40  

I went to Pycon in Santa Clara this year, and really enjoyed it. I learned a lot, and made quite a few connections. First the unpleasantness, the Adria Richards debacle. Much has been written already, so I'll make this brief. Adria Richards tweeted a picture of two men who were making sexual jokes behind her during a talk at the conference. Whether or not Adria chose the 'best' course of action for pointing out inappropriate behavior at a tech conference is an open question, and quite frankly beside the point. She chose what she thought was the best tool at the time, and there is no way she could have predicted what followed. What followed was a massive onslaught of threats and insults that was completely beyond the pale and speaks miles about how much sexism exists in the tech community. The reaction of the tech community shows that this community can be a very uncomfortable and often downright hostile place for women, and when incidents like this happen, it makes me incredulous that some people still wonder why women leave the IT community. If you would like to read more, I recommend these articles:

If you want to be depressed about the general state of conditions for women in IT, check out geekfeminism.

And, now onto much better things. My favorite talk was 'The Naming of Ducks: Where Dynamic Types Meet Smart Conventions' by Brandon Rhodes. It was very informative, and done with humor and great slides. My biggest pet peeve about technical talks is the slides containing huge swaths of programs. Most of the room can't even read it all, and all of that code usually distracts from the speakers point, anyway. These were nice, small bits of code, stripped down to the bare essentials to make the point. His talk is up on the awesome pyvideo site:


And you can see the slides here:


Another favorite talk, which was just chock-full of useful tidbits was 'Transforming Code into Beautiful, Idiomatic Python' by Raymond Hettinger. Another engaging, humorous speaker. His talk can also be seen on the pyvideo site:


and his slides are also available:


I also participated in a couple of days of sprints, and based on my experience, I have some unsolicited advice for anyone wanting to run a sprint. The purpose of a sprint is two-fold. The current software developers on the project want to get a piece of software out there, and the new software developers want to help. That is the basic. It is hoped that everyone will learn something and have some fun as well. So, to accomplish this, the current software developers should do some homework before the sprint. If you actually want the new software developers to be able to help you, you must be able to get them up and running as soon as possible. Here are the most important steps, as I see it:

  • make development environment for your project easy to set up
  • document how to set up the development environment
  • Follow your documentation and seriously spend time installing on new computers and/or wipe out your environment and re-install a couple of times. Simplify the procedure, make instructions clearer, re-iterate
  • create documentation on how group uses versioning and software used
  • list out some tasks that need to be done, rate tasks by complexity and size
  • have an example of a test(s) to ensure that the nothing has been broken by the new code

I repeat, the more time you spend making sure collaborators can hit the ground running, the more help they can give you. This not only helps for the sprint, but will make your project more welcoming to potential contributors in general.

PyCon 2013 ~ Comments: 0

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Charlie Rose


Health, Code Tech, Science

by maria on 26 Mar 2013 - 22:01  

I was on TV! Well, not really. My boss, Michael Shadlen, was on the Charlie Rose Show with Eric Kandel of Columbia University, Walter Mischel of Columbia University, Daniel Kahneman of Princeton University, and Alan Alda, host of the upcoming PBS program, “Brains on Trial”. But he showed some movies I made, so that's cool. There is a bit more information about the movies I've made for him here. The Charlie Rose show he is on is called "Public Policy Implications of the New Science of Mind" and it is part of his Brain Series. The whole show is very good, and I encourage you to watch all of it, but if you want to see the part where Mike talks about our research and shows the movies, go to 37:20. I created these movies by importing the experimental data into ActionScript and coding a re-creation of the experiment with the eye position of the animal superimposed on the re-creation of what she/he was seeing on the screen during the task. The spike train was added to the video, both visually and audibly, so you could get an idea of what was going on in the brain at the time. Link to Charlie Rose Show

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openldap configuration


Linux, SysAdmin, Ldap, Tech

by maria on 08 Mar 2013 - 01:27  

It use to be you edited slapd.conf to change configurations, but now openldap has its configuration in the database itself. Which means you can change the configuration without having to restart ldap. Or you can totally screw it up while its running. Cool. At any rate, the guides all helpfully say, now you change your configs just like you change anything else in your database by ldapmodify. Great. But, wait, how do I do that exactly? Well, first you need to know the cn, which isn't going to be the same as the changes you usually make. Fortunately, it is easy, cn=config. For an example, what if you want to check what schemas are loaded?

ldapsearch -LLLQY EXTERNAL -H ldapi:/// -b cn=schema,cn=config dn

The -L option used here causes the results to be displayed in LDAP Data Interchange Format (LDIF). A second -L will disable comments, and a third one will prevent the LDIF version from being printed. The default is to use extended LDIF. The -Q will enable SASL Quiet mode. Never prompt. The -Y will specify we want the EXTERNAL (usually TSL) authentication mechanism. If you want to see the entire structure of the schemas, omit the dn from the end.

To get a nice overview of the configurations:

ldapsearch -LLLQY EXTERNAL -H ldapi:/// -b cn=config "(|(cn=config)(olcDatabase={1}hdb))"

When I first started using the new configuration scheme, I could not authenticate to make any configuration changes, even though I could still make changes to our database. Something happened when I converted from ldapd.conf to the new configuration, so that I got this error message when trying to authenticate:

LDAP "Invalid credentials (49)" for cn=config (10.04 svr)

The problem is that normally I use cn=admin for making database changes, but to make configuration changes you have to use the olcRootDN, cn=admin,cn=config.

If you search by authenticating as config, you can tell if you will have this problem:

ldapsearch -xLLL -b cn=config -D cn=admin,cn=config -W olcDatabase={1}hdb

To fix this I re-created the olcRootDN and password. First get the encrypted version of your password by running this command:

slappasswd -h {MD5}

Type your password twice and copy the result in to a file with the following contents (I used emacs config.ldif):

dn: cn=config
changetype: modify

dn: olcDatabase={0}config,cn=config
changetype: modify
add: olcRootDN
olcRootDN: cn=admin,cn=config

dn: olcDatabase={0}config,cn=config
changetype: modify
add: olcRootPW
olcRootPW: {MD5}your password here

dn: olcDatabase={0}config,cn=config
changetype: modify
delete: olcAccess

Include the {MD5} part before the actual password. The delete: olcAccess is so that users other than root can have administrative access. Now load the config file:

ldapadd -Y EXTERNAL -H ldapi:/// -f config.ldif

One thing I wanted to do was change what was being indexing, so I created a file index.ldif

dn: olcDatabase={1}hdb,cn=config
changetype: modify
add: olcDbIndex
olcDbIndex: uid eq
add: olcDbIndex
olcDbIndex: cn eq
add: olcDbIndex
olcDbIndex: uidNumber eq

and loaded that:

ldapmodify -QY EXTERNAL -H ldapi:/// -f index.ldif

I decided what to index on by looking at the log files to see what was being searched on, but wasn't indexed.

There was something else strange that happened when I upgraded, the shadowLastChange attribute was missing from all of the people. So, I tried adding it back using this in my change.ldif file:

dn: uid=jd,ou=people,dc=example,dc=com
changetype: modify
replace: shadowLastChange
shadowLastChange: 15771

I got the following message:

add shadowLastChange:
modifying entry "uid=jd,ou=people,dc=example,dc=com"
ldap_modify: Constraint violation (19)
        additional info: attribute 'shadowLastChange' cannot have multiple values

That's strange. So, maybe it thinks it already has that attribute. let's see what happens if we try to modify it instead of add it:

replace shadowLastChange:
modifying entry "uid=jd,ou=people,dc=example,dc=com"
modify complete

Huh, well that seemed to have worked. Let's see what the value is now.

annette:~# ldapsearch -x "uid=jd" shadowLastChange
# extended LDIF
# LDAPv3
# base <dc=example,dc=com> (default) with scope subtree
# filter: uid=jd
# requesting: shadowLastChange 

# jd, people, example.com
dn: uid=jd,ou=people,dc=example,dc=com

# search result
search: 2
result: 0 Success

# numResponses: 2
# numEntries: 1

Um, so where is it? Interestingly, if I do stop ldap and do a slapcat, it shows up in the ldif file. So, it is there, I just can't see it using ldapsearch. Let's check permissions:

ldapsearch -LLLQY EXTERNAL -H ldapi:/// -b cn=config "(|(cn=config)(olcDatabase={1}hdb))"

olcAccess: {0}to attrs=userPassword,shadowLastChange by self write by anonymous auth by dn=
 "cn=admin,dc=example,dc=com" write by * none
olcAccess: {1}to dn.base="" by * read
olcAccess: {2}to * by self write by dn="cn=admin,dc=example,dc=com" write by * read

So, for userPassword and shadowLastChange the last permission is by * none, which effectively means that no one can read it. That is what we want for userPassword, but not what we want for shadowLastChange. Hmmm. So, now we learn how to change permissions. Probably it is easiest to just make separate entries for userPassword and shadowLastChange. So, I created this file:

dn: olcDatabase={1}hdb,cn=config
changetype: modify
delete: olcAccess
olcAccess: {0}
add: olcAccess
olcAccess: {0}to attrs=shadowLastChange by self write by anonymous auth by dn="cn=admin,dc=example,dc=com" write by * read
delete: olcAccess
olcAccess: {1}
add: olcAccess
olcAccess: {1}to attrs=userPassword by self write by anonymous auth by dn="cn=admin,dc=example,dc=com" write by * none
delete: olcAccess
olcAccess: {2}
add: olcAccess
olcAccess: {2}to dn.base="" by * read
add: olcAccess
olcAccess: {3}to * by self write by dn="cn=admin,dc=example,dc=com" write by * read

Order is important, which is why I rewrote all of the olcAccess attributes. Also syntax is important. Make sure you are using the correct dn, have the changetype, etc. Now implement your changes:

ldapmodify -QY EXTERNAL -H ldapi:/// -D cn=admin,cn=config -f change.config

And that should do it. But, no, now even though I have these permissions:

olcAccess: {0}to attrs=shadowLastChange by self write by anonymous auth by dn=
 "cn=admin,dc=example,dc=com" write by * read
olcAccess: {1}to attrs=userPassword by self write by anonymous auth by dn="cn=
 admin,dc=example,dc=com" write by * none
olcAccess: {2}to dn.base="" by * read
olcAccess: {3}to * by self write by dn="cn=admin,dc=example,dc=com" write by * read

I still can't read the shadowLastChange.

Aha! And now another lesson in openldap permissions. Order is important. I have stated in my permission for shadowLastChange 'by anonymous auth', so if I try to look at shadowLastChange anonymously, we come to this directive and stop, cause it looks like we don't have permission to read. Doesn't matter that later on, we say that anyone can read. So, be careful when you are adding a new directive that you put it in the correct place, and that there isn't a directive there already that contradicts it. In this case, the way I added the new rule 'by read *', I was effectively saying, everyone but anonymous has read permission. If we move the directive 'by read *' earlier, we give anonymous read permission by giving everyone read permission, and it makes no sense to then say they have auth permission, which is more restricted access. So, we drop that directive altogether. Here is my new configuration:

olcAccess: {0}to attrs=shadowLastChange by self write by dn="cn=admin,dc=example,dc=com" write by * read
olcAccess: {1}to attrs=userPassword by self write by dn="cn=admin,dc=example,dc=com" write by anonymous auth by * none
olcAccess: {2}to dn.base="" by * read
olcAccess: {3}to * by self write by dn="cn=admin,dc=example,dc=com" write by * read

And, seems like a good idea to post the who and the what:

*All, including anonymous and authenticated users
anonymousAnonymous (non-authenticated) users
usersAuthenticated users
selfUser associated with target entry
dn[.<basic-style>]=<regex>Users matching a regular expression
dn.<scope-style>=<DN>Users within scope of a DN

Access Levels:

none=0no access
disclose=dneeded for information disclosure on error
auth=dxneeded to authenticate (bind)
compare=cdxneeded to compare
search=scdxneeded to apply search filters
read=rscdxneeded to read search results
write=wrscdxneeded to modify/rename
manage=mwrscdxneeded to manage

Of course, all of this information and more is in the docs

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Apache and SSL


Tech, Apache, SSL, PHP,Linux,SysAdmin

by maria on 01 Mar 2013 - 22:51  

Once upon a time we had set up our web server so that we had a secure VirtualHost pointing to a subdirectory of /var/www, so the DocumentRoot for the secure site was /var/www/https. This worked just fine. Some content was just for our own use, and required secure login, and some content was for the general public, and did not. Then we decided it would be better if our website was a wiki, so that everyone in the lab could update the website. Since our website was initially not a wiki, and we wanted to save some content from the old site, we had set up the wiki as a subdirectory of /var/www. The wiki had some links to the old content. Once we got the wiki up and running, we decided it would be good if the login to the wiki was over SSL.

To do this, we needed the main /var/www directory to allow https access sometimes, but not always. If you always run everything over SSL, there is larger overhead, and pages are likely to load more slowly. So, we can just make the DocumentRoot for both /var/www and use code to switch between SSL and non-SSL, right? I assumed that pages would be served by HTTP unless SSL was requested, but it turns out at least one browser I know of will choose SSL over non-SSL if both are offered by the server. Which means that the dumb solution of just checking to see if the person requesting a page is trying to edit or login and then requiring SSL wasn't going to work, as general public looking for our website was just as likely to be given a login window as site content. This could be dealt with on the wiki, since it runs on PHP, but was not clear how to do deal with the rest of the website.

So, maybe we just want to worry about the wiki having SSL login, since that is the only place needing it. Anything else on the website has to be edited directly on the server. The alias directive seemed a good solution. This allows you to add content not under the document root to be served as part of the document tree. You enable the mod_alias module by the following commands

a2enmod alias
service apache2 restart

Now, I am using CleanURLs for my wiki, so I needed to figure out how to set this up when using SSL. I don't know of a way to do and if statement in htaccess to check if someone is using SSL, but a side effect of having different root directories for the normal and SSL site is that I could just use 2 different htaccess files. One is for the non-SSL site:

RewriteCond %{HTTP_HOST} ^example.com
RewriteRule (.*) http://www.example.com/$1 [R=301,L]

and the other for the SSL site:

RewriteCond %{HTTPS_HOST} ^example.com
RewriteRule (.*) https://www.example.com/$1 [R=301,L]

And the Rewrite Base and Rewrite Rules are going to be slightly different.

So, now for the PHP solution. I started by using a recipe on the PmWiki website for enablingSSL for the initial log in. Really, this seemed to be the only time that SSL was really necessary. But, there seemed to be no memory in the PHP code of logging in via SSL when we returned to HTTP, so after the initial logging in, if you tried to edit a different page, you were asked for a password again. Well, that got old fast, and hinted that there was a possible security hole. The most sensible solution seemed to be to have the whole session using SSL, but there was no obvious way to do this from the recipes available on the PmWiki site. So, I went on the PmWiki user mailing list to try to figure out how to adapt one of the recipes for my purpose. In the end, I used a combination of a hint from Patrick Michaud and a recipe by jtankers. If your interested, you can see my code pmwiki ssl

And, indeed, it seemed to work fine, mostly. But, remember how alias adds content not under the document root to be served as part of the document tree? This means that if you try to see content above the alias (ie. something in /var/www), according to the secure site configuration, apache should look in /var/www/https, since this is the root for the secure site. So, stuff that had been linked to in the wiki from other directories in /var/www was not showing up in the secure site. I managed to solve this by changing paths in the PHP code that runs our wiki.

More Apache hints, in no particular order:

  • MultiViews requires that files are owned by the group that apache runs as, in my case www-data, and that permissions are set to 770:
    1. chgrp www-data /var/www/ -R
    2. chmod 770 /var/www/ -R
    When you edit files, make sure you are a part of the correct group (newgrp www-data) or that you change the group after you edit.
  • if you are using Clean URLS, you need to have AllowOverride set to All
  • not strictly an Apache hint, but if you want to post an email address on a website in such a way it is unlikely to be found by bots, use an ascii to html code converter (converter apps available on the web, just search), and enter the email address with html code (looks like test). To be extra careful, add spaces around the @ symbol.
  • mod_rewrite can do everything mod_alias can do, and a lot more.
    • Use mod_alias (Redirect in htaccess) when you can because it is cleaner, uses less cpus and overhead, and easier to figure out what is going on when looking at configuration after the fact.
    • Use mod_rewrite when you are trying to stop things from displaying in the url bar.
    • rules in .htaccess are executed in order, however, Rewrite has priority over Redirect.
    • more excellent hints on mod_rewrite and mod_alias can be found here

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Thanks Mike!


Tech, MyRamblings, MyLife, Kids

by Maria on 28 Feb 2013 - 01:38  

I thought about waiting another couple of weeks before posting, so it wouldn't be so obvious that I have been seriously delinquent with posting, but heh, life happens. And lots of life has happened. For starters, my son was born last April. Insert requisite photo here:

Attach:bash.jpg Δ

So, for a while I chose sleep over blogging. So goes it.

Another life that happened is that my boss moved to Columbia University in NY. We decided not to follow him, so I have been slowly beginning the job hunt process. I'm nervous and excited. Looking forward to the new challenge. I've learned so much working for Mike. It has given me a sampling of all kinds of stuff, and allowed me to recognize what I am truly interested in, programming, while giving me a broad base of skills that complement coding.

Mike, thanks so much for giving me the opportunity to work in your lab. It has been a great adventure. I was given freedom to build what I thought was needed. A diverse and awesome team to work with. Guidance when it was needed. Fun and interesting projects to work on. I loved making movies for your talks. Creating movies that were a truly accurate representation of the lab experiments was challenging and intriguing. Working in neuroscience, I practiced the scientific method. As a system administrator, I gained awesome problem solving and troubleshooting skills. Working on projects while being responsible for the day to day running of the servers and being a consultant to others in the lab (and in the neuroscience community in general) taught me organizational skills and improved my communication. Not to mention the value of good documentation and testing, testing, testing. And, of course, a greater appreciation of soccer and jazz.

As this job ends, I have also decided to combine my tech writing and my blog writing more, instead of having a separate part of my website for "work", which often just ended up being "anything tech I ran into and found interesting or hard to figure out and wanted to document". I was reluctant to write tech stuff in my blog, because that is often a work in progress, and I was trying not to edit my blog entries (much), once they were written. But, heh, this is my blog, so I can make the rules, and I'd rather start using the blog for tech stuff as well as life ramblings so that I can take advantage of keywords and stuff. So, there you go, some blog entries are going to evolve over time as I learn.

And, for some inspiration:

To me, coding is writing stuff that makes computers come to life. In the Wizard of Oz the wizard is seen as a fraud, creating smoke and mirrors to hide that he is an ordinary man, but I like to think of it as being the ordinary person that is proud to be the wizard that by just writing "stuff" makes wondrous things happen.

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More Education


MyRamblings, Kids by maria on 16 Mar 2011 - 03:45  

Just watched a couple more TED Talks regarding education, and they wonderfully reinforce what I've been thinking about, and wrote about in yesterday's Blog Post. The first one is by Sugata Mitra, and he speaks about his "hole in the wall" experiments, where he shows that you can set a computer in front of a group of kids, who have never seen a computer before, and who don't know English, and they will teach themselves how to use it, and often start to teach themselves English as well. His website is http://www.hole-in-the-wall.com/ and there is some interesting stuff there. Again, fuel kids curiosity, allow them to make mistakes, and they will learn. His most recent Ted Talk is pretty amusing, and he has some amazing stories of children teaching themselves.

The second TED Talk I watched was by Sir Ken Robinson. Actually, I watched two by him. He is a wonderfully entertaining speaker, and I recommend watching both talks. His first talk ties in very well with my post yesterday. He believes that we stifle creativity when we teach kids to always be correct. When we are very young, we are not afraid of being wrong. We say the darndest things. As we get older, we learn in school that different is often wrong, and that there is a single correct answer for all important questions. And, as wrong becomes more stigmatized, we become more afraid of being wrong, and less creative. The talk on creativity and the more recent TED Talk, Bring on the learning revolution! also criticize our current educational system for essentially educating for just a single sort of vocation, and a single sort of learning, and a single sort of individual. His idea is to have a less linear system, but I wish he had spoken a bit more about what that would look like. It did made me think about how I would like to change how progression in school works. I don't believe it is useful to have grades which are sorted by age. I would be very interested to see a school where children move to a new grade when they want to, and feel they are ready, and the teacher agrees. I wonder what that would look like? I would love to see a school try that. Anyone know of a school that has tried that? To facilitate that, I would make school more of a continuum, with a shorter break in the summer, so that there wasn't a specific time that was set aside for changing grades. In yet a different TED talk, Seth Priebatsch explains the power of games, and discusses how this might be used in education. Instead of having a traditional grading system, students could level up when they master a concept. Brilliant.

UPDATE: Check out the animated version of Sir Ken Robinson's Changing Education Paradigms. So well done.
Sir Ken Robinson

If you're not prepared to be wrong, you will never come up with anything original. ~Sir Ken Robinson

Okay, one more. This talk by Salman Kahn has a couple of innovations for education that are pretty brilliant. It combines the ideas of self-pace learning, kids learning together, and using technology to make education more human and personal to present a beautiful idea of what a classroom can look like. His great insite is to give kids videos of lectures so they can follow the lecture at their own pace, and then doing the homework in the classroom, so they can get personal help from the teacher, or another student who is already proficient in that area. I remember thinking how brilliant it was to have lectures on line when one of my math class professors started doing it. Not only could I then sleep in and miss the lecture, but I could pause and rewind my professor as I tried to parse what he was telling me. One thing that was very interesting about this talk, was some data he presented on how kids learn. Sometimes kids get stuck on a concept, and seem to be stagnating. If you let the kids continue to work on it, get help from other kids and/or the teacher, they will eventually figure it out. And once they do figure it out, they will then jump through more concepts at an much higher pace, giving a progression that looks like someone who is slow or a troubled learner at first, but then suddenly is performing like a gifted child, until they get stuck again. So in a traditional school, depending on what teacher they had what time, they may get labeled as brilliant or slow, and we all know what happens when kids receive labels...

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Sparkling Lies



by maria on 15 Mar 2011 - 03:07  

Attach:sparklingice.jpg Δ

A few weeks back I bought a drink called Sparkling Ice. It looked to be one of those flavored carbonated water drinks, and it said "Naturally Flavored" on the bottle. I took that to meant that it didn't have any artificial sweeteners in it. Silly me. I took one swig of the drink, and knew I had been fooled. Apparently sweet is not a flavor? I was irritated enough to find an email address for the company and complain. Someone from the company, let's call her Jess, emailed me back, and told me she would tell upper level management, and offered to send me "a sample of an all natural (organic) beverage we make that might be in keeping with what you prefer to drink". I thought that sounded nice, so I gave her my address and thanked her for listening to me.

About a week and a half later, I received a box of about six bottles of the Sparkling Ice product that I had complained about. With a note on the top from Jess, the customer relations person who had sent me the email.

I sent a thank you note to Jess and mentioned that she had sent me the same product I had been complaining about. She said, "I'm so sorry, I had a temp helping me and I didn't check her work. I'll personally resend product without sucralose." Which struck me as a little lame. Like my friend said, blaming the temp is pretty low. Own your mistakes. She did send me better drinks the second time. I am a fan of Talking Rain Sparkling Water, which doesn't have any sweeteners in it. She sent me that and some Twist, which is pretty good. So, I'd say mixed bag when it comes to Talking Rain Customer Service and Marketing Depts. Clearly making an effort, and I really appreciate my free drinks, but it was kind of like pulling teeth, more uncomfortable than you really want it to be. I still think one shouldn't be able to put "Naturally Flavored" on a beverage that has artificial sweeteners in it. She claimed that my "comments weigh very heavy into the decision making process", but I'm thinking probably not heavy enough to change their "Naturally Flavored" claim.

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MyRamblings, Kids by maria on 15 Mar 2011 - 01:55  

I've been thinking quite a bit about education lately. I read a wonderful editorial about some high school students that designed and ran their own education for a semester. These high school students did some amazing things. They were using techniques that are presented very well by Diana Laufenberg in her TED Talk. What it comes down to is giving students the opportunity to use their voice and to fail. We are living in a world where information is everywhere. We do not need teachers to give students information. We need teachers to help students to filter the information that is everywhere, to teach kids to think critically, and fuel kids curiosity. We need teachers to guide them so that they learn how to ask questions, how to figure out what went wrong, and to learn that, despite what they are taught by standardized tests, in life there is no one right answer. The 3 ways to teach that she advocates are:

  • experiential learning
  • student voice
  • embracing failure

I think she is on to something.

Something else that I have been thinking about is the importance of networking and social interactions in general in the grown up world. Seems like we should be trying to teach kids about the importance of learning how to interact productively with others, especially people that are different from themselves. Some of this is learned by team sports, but short of that, nothing really. Being social is so important at this age, it seems like there should be ways to harness their interest in it to help them become more effective at communication and team work. Social interactions as usually practiced by teenagers if pretty much the opposite of what you want to learn to be effective in the adult world. When you sit down at a table to solve a problem as a group, you just can't tell by looking who at the table may have some key bit of knowledge or insight to share. It is so important to understand and believe that if you want to solve a problem as a group. Giving everyone a voice and listening to what everyone has to say is so key to effective problem solving. And knowing when to shut up. More teenagers need to learn that one. Probably more adults as well. Okay, I'll shut up now. But first, a gratuitous picture of my daughter, since this blog post seems to be lacking a visual.

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Health, MyRamblings, Videos

by maria on 28 Oct 2010 - 14:11  

Wow. Check out this performance for a poetry slam. I tried to find out more about Katie Makkai, but didn't get anywhere. I'm hoping we will be hearing more from her.

I'm not sure that we are any more obsessed with beauty now then when I was in high school, but it doesn't seem to be getting any better. But, I do have hope that with more people having access to more real people all over the world via the internet, rather than only seeing a window to the rest of the world that was filtered by mass media like when I was a kid, that more people will realize how damaging our limited view of beauty is. One can hope. In the meantime, remember, you are beautiful.

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Health, MyRamblings, Science

by maria on 25 Oct 2010 - 18:06  

Our brains have to sort out a lot of stuff. We aren't consciously aware of most of the stuff going on, which is a good thing, since just walking across the room would be a serious challenge if we had to think about every bit of muscle movement. There was a bit on npr recently about a guy who had a stroke that wiped out his ability to read. English suddenly looked like some foreign language that he didn't know. But, his motor memory of writing was still in tact, so if he pretended to write the letters that he saw, he was now able to recognize the letters. But, that is a lot of effort, and if you had to think like that for everything you did, it would be difficult to get anything done. Fortunately, our brain takes care of lots of stuff behind the scenes, and we are unaware of it even happening. However, now we are discovering that some things our brains do without our realizing it may be causing us problems. I recently ran across an old article by Gavin Mandel, published in Science magazine in 2005, which was fascinating, and I hope people that missed it when it came out will take a look at it now. The basic finding is that we are profoundly influenced by our environment, but completely unaware of this influence. Not only that, but even when people/researchers try to make us aware when we have been influenced, we do not believe it, and our mind makes up stories to otherwise explain the influenced behavior. So, I guess when we sound like we are making something up to justify our actions after the fact, rather than explaining why we decided to do something, we may be doing just that. It does put an interesting light on our gut feelings.

The majority of the time, our unconscious does a stellar job picking out the relevant information, and making decisions based on that, but unsurprisingly, it doesn't always get it correct. It seems likely that the more we are bombarded by media trying to influence our decisions, the less reliable it may become. It is hard to imagine how our unconscious deals with such a large amount of, often conflicting, data, but scientists are starting to figure this out. It appears that there are certain rules that our unconsciousness uses to guide it. One is exemplified by a pantyhose experiment summarized in the 'Introspective Essay', and it points to a bias for the first thing the brain sees. One of the best studied biases is race. I am trying to find a source of various biases that our brains have constructed, because I think this would be useful knowledge for everyone to have when they are making decisions. Because intuition is not always correct, it is sometimes based on rules that we may not consciously agree with, but have internalized. I will close with a quote from cognitive neuroscientist Itiel Dror,

"Take what you believe is an absolute truth with a grain of salt," Dorr suggested. "Question yourself, and understand that we're all locked in our own brain, in our own perceptions, with our own experiences that paint the world. We may have a better understanding of the world if we know that what we see is not 100 percent the world itself, it iw us interacting with the world around us." *

* From the article, Experts Live and Die With Mental Shortcuts, from Miller-McCune.

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False Confession?


Politics, MyRamblings, Science

by maria on 21 Sep 2010 - 14:00  

I have recently started reading a blog with a bit of a narcissistic byline, "What the smartest people on the net read." Fortunately, they seem to be living up to their name. I found the blog post, What would you do? to be especially interesting. The post is discussing an article by Professor Garrett that is about the surprising amount of detail that can be found in false confessions gathered by police officers, and how this detail is most likely being disclosed to them during the interrogation process. People seem to instinctively believe that false confessions would be weak, but the detail included in most of these confessions makes them seem substantial. The blog post recommends making changes to the criminal procedures to take into account the reliability of confessions and their content.

It seems that many people think that most people are not likely to confess to crimes they did not commit. I wonder if this is because most people believe that they themselves would not give in. After all, we are talking about situations where physical torture is not involved. I have always thought of myself as pretty strong, but have recently found myself in a situation where I allowed myself to be psychologically manipulated, and did not even realize it until a few hours later. I'm not trying to say that people offering false confessions do not realize they are giving false confessions, but that our ability to resist may be very dependent on the situation. If there is one thing I have learned about myself during my life, it is that I don't know myself as well as I thought I did. I am capable of surprising myself when I find myself in a novel situation, and being falsely accused of a crime would fall into that category. From the post, "According to one person who (falsely) committed to a crime, "You've never been in a situation so intense, and you're naive about your rights,' he said. 'You don't know what you'll say to get out of that situation.'"

Changing criminal procedures to take into account the reliability of confessions and their content seems especially important, because according to another article Farnam Street Blog did a post about, jurors don't even discount evidence obtained from rough treatment. It therefor seems really unlikely that they would take into consideration the validity of a confession full of detail and taken when rough treatment isn't involved. The Garrett article recommends "a series of reforms that focus on the insidious problem of contamination, particularly videotaping interrogations in their entirety, but also reframing police procedures, trial practice, and judicial review." I concur.

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Adobe, A rant


MyRamblings, Tech

by Maria on 03 May 2010 - 15:53  

I have enjoyed using Flash for quite a while. Mostly I use it to make movies for work, but have been playing around with it lately to make more creative animations. So, when I heard the news that Microsoft Agrees With Apple And Google: "The Future Of The Web Is HTML5", I was a bit dismayed. Now I have long believed that flash was wrong for creating websites, but thought it would remain the standard for video and games. And, I believe that will still be true for a while. if you look at the demo page for html5, you will see that most of the demos are using things useful for building interactive websites, but not any of them demonstrate animation created by HTML5. Even the stuff that will eventually be used to create online games is pretty crude yet. Not sure what the Canvas demo does, since I couldn't get it to load with any of the 3 browsers I tried. So, I think we are a ways yet from animation and online games with HTML5. However, given my recent experiences with Adobe, I am thinking about learning HTML5 now anyway, even though I will be much more limited in what I can do, because I am sick of Adobe. Adobe Tech Support sucks! Not to mention their programs are getting to be so bulky and buggy they are painful to use.

My Adobe saga:

Part 1:

Saving a pdf without comments.

I thought this was pretty straightforward, but I had to repeat what I was trying to do 4 times before they gave me a solution. All I was trying to do was to hide/get rid of the comments in a pdf that was being sent in an email. They gave me solutions for how to use comments for an email review, told me how to hide comments from my current view, etc. They even wanted me to send a pdf with comments in it, because that was somehow going to help them understand what I wanted. Hello, you are Adobe, surely you have a pdf with comments in it laying around on your desktop?!? Finally, after 6 emails from Adobe, they gave me the solution. For those curious, here is the highly intuitive solution:

Go To Advanced-> PDF Optomizer->Discard User Data->Check the Tab Discard All Comments , forms and multimedia.-> Click Ok.

Now save this pdf with a different name, and you can send your pdf itinerary to your boss, without your comments about meeting your colleagues after the meeting for drinks. Are we really the only people who find this useful?

Part 2:

Upgrading the Organizer in Acrobat

My boss upgraded from Acrobat 8 to Acrobat 9. When he tried to open the organizer in Acrobat 9, the window was missing, and it was apparent from the menu that nothing from Acrobat 8 had been moved over. I sent in an email request for help, but was told this was not an installation issue, and I needed to have bronze support. I tried calling them, spent eons on hold, just to have them tell me, once again, that this was not an installation issue so I needed to pay for support. Not an installation issue? I installed the software, and it didn't work, and didn't import stuff from the last version. How can this be anything except an installation issue?!? So, I went off in search of paid support. Buying support from Adobe is convoluted, especially if you have a volume license. Supposedly there are support packages, where you get so many support calls per year, or maybe some number of support calls, but I never did figure this out. Nor did I figure out what bronze support is. Since there is a new version of Adobe products coming out, I decided it was probably best to just buy one support instance, especially since given the cost of my time doing research trying to figure this shit out, it would probably be cheaper to pay by the instance anyway. So, I spent another 2 hours on the phone, mostly on hold, during which I solved the missing Organizer window problem without any help from Adobe. When they told me the import problem wasn't an installation issue, I said fine, I'll pay. They ended up not charging me, although they lectured me on how this was an Acrobat 8 issue (since I was trying to export from Acrobat 8), so next time they would charge me. Like what, I didn't buy Acrobat 8 from them, and the reason I was trying to export was to have a WORKING INSTALLATION of Acrobat 9? WTF? But then, in the end, they told me it was impossible. You cannot get your Organizer settings from Acrobat 8 to Acrobat 9. I filed a bug report. I had already sent a letter to the CEO complaining about their tech support, but maybe I should send him an addendum?

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More disbelief in Science


Health, MyRamblings, Science

by maria on 21 Apr 2010 - 21:20  

Just read a very good article Convincing the Public to Accept New Medical Guidelines. It has me thinking about how to convince people to change their beliefs. It has long been obvious to me that people often discount or don't believe scientific studies if they conflict with their pre-conceived notions. Now we have research to back up that claim, not that it would matter to people who don't believe me. Plus, apparently people are more likely to believe what everyone else believes, regardless, or apparently in spite of, scientific evidence to the contrary, according to this article. Ugh. Not sure where this puts us. A very uphill battle, but says a lot about why people still believe that there is a connection between immunizations and autism. So, how can we take current scientific understanding and translate it into something that is popular? How can we use our understanding of why/how people believe things to get them to believe in scientific evidence, and to be willing to change those beliefs when new evidence surfaces? Tough questions.

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Red Herrings


Health, Politics, MyRamblings, Tech, Science

by Maria on 13 Apr 2010 - 21:10  

Herring (Kippered)

I very much enjoyed the TED talk by Michael Specter on the danger of science denial. His main point is that we will continue to do real damage to our planet and our communities, if we continue to ignore what science tells us. His two main examples are the trend to not immunize because of the supposed link between autism and immunizations, and frankofoods, iow, genetically modified foods. I think both of these cases demonstrate the publics tendency to take a scary finding, latch onto the first thing that comes along to blame, and then ignoring science and facts and beat the hell out of the red herring. In the case of the autism and immunizations, study after study has shown there is no link. But the original study, however misguided, did demonstrate that we need to continue to put pressure on manufacturers and the government to ensure that vaccines are safe to use, as some things were brought up that were questionable. We need to learn to accept science and facts when they become undoubtable, stop beating a dead horse, and look to new places for answers. That second point is very important. There is much money and time now being spent trying to convince parents that autism is caused by immunizations, money that should be spent on coming up with the actual causes and cures to autism. Not to mention this misguidedness is causing a crisis in immunization that could cause many diseases that we have not seen in decades to return to the United States. If you are unconvinced that immunizations do not cause autism, check out this pdf from immunize.org.

The second issue, genetically modified foods, is very interesting. In this case, the red herring is GMO's themselves. Although more research is needed, so far, it appears that the insertion of new genes does not, by itself, change the plant in a negative way. In Specter's talk he mentioned the noble ideas about adding vitamin A in rice and adding protein and vitamins in cassava, using genetic modification. He did not mention anything about adding resistance to pesticides or insecticides. These are the truly scary things, the things we should be up in arms about. The movie Monsanto's World is extremely interesting, and brings to mind the things we need to be extremely concerned about. First and foremost, are the ties between government and corporations. Monsanto has become a scary monopoly because the US government let it happen, and, in fact, encouraged it to happen. And, it can, and probably has, happened in other industries as well. It is the ties between industry and government that has caused the scientific data to not be scrutinized as it should be. Check out the wikipedia article about Monsanto, under Public officials formerly employed by Monsanto. Which brings up and interesting question. Who should be in charge of government agencies that oversee industries? In many cases, it seems the government decides that people from industry are the best choice, since they would presumably know the most about that particular industry. But, they also have the hardest time separating themselves from the corporations they use to be a part of, and present a real conflict of interest. Time after time, in many different industries, government has failed to enforce or enact the regulations it should in the interest of public safety, because of the ties with corporations. The other thing that we should be up in arms about is the abuse of patent law by Monsanto. Monsanto has used patent law to bully farmers, so that it now controls most of the U.S. corn and soy seed market, according to the non-profit Center for Food Safety. And there is no doubt that Monsanto and its connections in government have worked hard to suppress scientific evidence that its products are not as harmless as it claims. But, you shouldn't take my word on this, do your research. So, while I agree with Specter about there being good that can come from genetic modification, and while at its root, it is not much different from the modifications we have been making to animals and plants for hundreds of thousands of years by breeding, there is still some very scary stuff going on in the genetic modification industry, and most of it has to do with the corporation that controls a very large portion of the seed market, Monsanto, and allows farmers to completely douse their fields with herbicides and/or insecticides. And regardless of whether the food that has been modified to survive such dowsing is harmful, we already know that dowsing fields with herbicides and/or pesticides is terrible for the soil and the nature/people surrounding the fields. For the most common of these herbicides, Roundup, check out the wikipedia article.

Which brings me to another interesting article I have read recently. In the article Is it okay to ignore results from people you don't trust? by Ben Goldacre on badscience.net. He gives a nice example of industry scientists getting the results you would expect them to want, which was different from what non-industry scientists found. Repeated experiences like this makes it is easy for us to ignore results from people we don't trust. We have come to expect scientists from industry to get results more favorable to their industry (which is why the government should have been more critical of the data from Monsanto), but then he goes on to give an example of researchers you may not normally trust, publishing a study with a result that was both accurate and earlier then any other researchers. So, it appears that it is not enough that the public pay attention to scientific data, the public must learn to think critically about the data that they are given. Consider the source, but also consider the data itself. Ask questions. Be skeptical, but do not reject science simply because you want to believe in voodoo. And above all, do not look for studies to validate your opinion, because you will find them no matter how crazy your opinion is. Instead, look at everything you can find that examines the question with an open mind, consider the sources, the methods, the number of studies, and ask questions until you are satisfied. But when some new piece of evidence comes up, be willing to look anew at the question, and to reconsider your position. Yup, it is a lot of work, but it is so very important to our health and the health of our planet.

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Ada Lovelace Day


Lovelace, Tech

by maria on 25 Mar 2010 - 01:30  

Today is Ada Lovelace Day once again, and I thought today I would spotlight a modern day techie entrepreneur. Cathy Malmrose started her own business selling hardware running linux in 2007. She impresses me not only because I am awed by people willing to start their own business, but also because she was discouraged from anything technical or scientific as a child. It took her a long time to overcome this discouragement, but she has in a big way, and now is an inspiration to girls and women interested in science and technology. I just love her journal entry about her girls learning how to install linux on a computer.

Nelson Mandela is an inspiration to her, and the name of her company, ZaReason comes in part from Za, the country code for South Africa, and Reason, "which translates well in many languages, and has many meanings". I love that she decided to include a screwdriver with all ZaReason computers to "communicate that we respect people's ownership of their new laptop or desktop and we respect their intelligence to be able to modify it."

Cathy is also involved with charitable projects through a non-profit, http://www.Partimus.org.

LInks about Cathy:

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Great Ad


Health, Videos

by maria on 2 Feb 2010 - 22:31  

Yup, it is an ad about preventing HIV transmission. very amusing, and hopefully effective.

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Week in Review


Health, Politics, Tech, Science, Videos

by maria on 31 Jan 2010 - 20:04  

Lots about death this week, but lets start with autism. Andrew Wakefield, the doctor who supposedly linked MMR and autism, is closer than ever to being banned from practicing as a doctor, according to NewScientist. Apparently the ban (on him and two co-authors) doesn't actually have to do with the autism claims, but has "concerned itself with the conduct, duties, and responsibilities of each doctor". However, the findings of the investigators does seriously call into question his integrity as a scientist as well, apparently peppered with words such as "dishonest", "irresponsible" and "misleading". It is so sad the panic this mans irresponsible claims have caused over immunizations. While true that the attention over this has caused manufacturers and regulators to pay more attention to the safety of vaccines, which is very important, it has also meant much valuable time and resources have been spent disproving this link. Time and resources that should have been going to investigate, more likely links.

Continuing on to the death theme, we move on to a very concerning development with the "suicides" in Guantanamo back in June of 2006. I highly recommend reading the Harper's article in full, but if you want the short version, watch the video at the bottom of the update. I am sickened by our government, and hope that the Obama administration will do the right thing, and come clean with all that has happened, before and since, they came to power, regarding Guantanamo and the policies of torture by the USA.

This afternoon I read an article in The New Yorker about dying and mourning. I had already been thinking about death after hearing an amazing podcast from Radio Lab. The 8th segment, at about 13:30, is a story by David Eagleman from his book, SUM, read by Jeffrey Tambor. I recommend listening to the entire hour, but this is the story that got me thinking down this particular line. It is sort of an echo of something that I had been thinking about, although better articulated than I could have done, and it's kind of a natural continuation of my thoughts about emergence. It is the thought that there is a connection that we all have at many levels. There is the connection between our atoms, molecules, cells and cell structures, organs, organisms, planets, etc., which form groups at various levels. Maybe it is true that at each level there is some awareness of the interconnectedness, and some feeling like loss when the group breaks up. Strange that a type of mourning that may happen to my atoms when I die is a comfort to me, and whose to say there is no awareness in atoms or planets? Next thing you know, I'll be following the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. I do recommend the article in The New Yorker about dying and mourning, and which has nothing to do with the Flying Spaghetti Monster. I agree with Meghan O'Rourke, I think we do not do the death and mourning thing well in the USA.

Before we leave the death theme, I'd like to take a moment to join many fans, friends and family in the mourning of Howard Zinn and J. D. Salinger. Both made amazing contributions to our society, and I am very grateful for their lives, loves and works.

On the tech front, a scary thing happened with Facebook on AT&T phones. Apparently last weekend, some people with AT&T phones logged into Facebook, and found themselves in someone else's account. There is a good, but somewhat technical, article about what happened and what needs to be done about it at the Electronic Frontier Foundation.

As a reaction to the crazy ruling recently by the Supreme Court, Murray Hill Inc. is running for congress. Hmmm.

Interesting article about skunk weed. According to the article, "studies have shown that pure, synthetic THC causes transient psychosis in 40 to 50 per cent of healthy people". Apparently, there is normally a compound in weed, cannabidiol (CBD), that counteracts the psychosis producing effects of THC. Guess we should stick to the other strains...

Finally, time for some fun. Start with the Ultimate Graphic Novel (in Six Panels). The first comment was almost as good as the novel. Also discovered a great music site, http://digital.thinkindie.com, and found a cool new video, Anna Rose "Picture":

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Health, Kids, myLife

by maria on 24.01.2010 - 14:21  

The bad news is that my daughter has another migraine. The good news is that I think we have discovered a major trigger. It appears she most often gets migraines when she doesn't get enough sleep. I've thought for years that it is very important for children to get plenty of sleep, and certainly this is the case for Tanika.

Here is a great link about children and sleep:


We have found that we need to put Tanika to bed at 9pm on school nights. She gets up around 6:30, so assuming it takes her 15 min. or so to go to sleep, she sleeps around 9 hours. This seems to be about right for her, as she usually gets up pretty easily on this schedule. I use to think that when she had a big assignment at school that she wasn't going to get finished in time, I should let her stay up to finish it. I'm rethinking this now. Since she is still in Middle school, I think it is probably better that she takes the hit on not having her assignment done, and gets her full sleep instead. And we teach her how to plan out her homework and not wait to the last minute, because school work is important, but school work is going to suffer without sleep, and sleep needs to take top priority, or else she literally suffers. While it is true that the migraines seem to occur when her sleep is seriously deprived (they seem to follow sleepovers most often), I think that even small losses in sleep are bad for her.

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Potato Knishes



by Maria on 24.01.2010 - 01:48  

So I tried to make Potato Knishes the other day, and was not entirely successful at it. (No, the picture above is definitely not what I came up with, this is from the broke gourmet, where the recipe is from.) I ended up with rather yummy potatoes mashed with onion, cheese and thyme. The bread wrapping is where things went wrong. I used whole wheat pastry flour instead of all-purpose flour. I was surprised to learn that pastry flour makes pastry dough. My dough broke apart easily, and would not roll into anything. I sort of thought that it would be the different ratios of dough ingredients that made the biggest change. Apparently, the grind of the flour makes a huge difference. I do wonder why. May have to investigate this further. In the meantime, I definitely want to make these again, but going to try the all-purpose flour this time. I can confirm that the insides of these knishes are really great; in fact, I'm going to have another bowl of knish innards right now.


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Global Scrub Down



by maria on 14.01.2010 - 01:21  

Wow, this is completely fascinating, if true: Climate Change Catastrophe took Just Months. I read this article a while ago, and I've let it brew a bit. The article explains how the most recent ice age may have come on quite suddenly, like in about 6 months, as opposed to the many years previously assumed. Researcher William Patterson and colleagues believe a large, very cold lake in North America called Lake Agassiz burst its banks, and the large volume of freezing fresh water disrupted the Gulf Stream emough to cause lots of ice to form, which then kept the air cold, preventing the flow to return to its pre-ice age currents. So, thus was a born a mini-ice age of 1,300 years.

My first thought was, if it is true that such dramatic climate change can happen so quickly and so relatively easily, we are really fucking lucky we haven't triggered something crazy, with all of our mucking about with the earth. Think of all of the things we have done in our short time on earth. We have transformed vast treks of land from forests and mixed vegetation to farmland, cities, pastures, etc.; we have dumped all kinds of chemicals (including tons of crude oil) into the ground and waterways; damned rivers; and poured smoke and chemicals into the atmosphere, including not just the usual suspects, but the occasional nuclear bomb, test, or accident. Those are just the things that poppped immediately into my head. Somehow, it seems like some of that has probably done some harm. The findings in this study mean interesting things for our future. Strangely, it can be used as an argument either for mucking about more or less. One argument goes, well then it shouldn't be too hard to figure out how to counteract global warming, all we have to do is empty a big vat of cold water in a water current to disturb the flow, and we can reverse the warming we have caused. We can create all kinds of models to figure out the precise amount and place to do this. Obviously, this sort of thinking has some flaws. Most obviously, we are quite likely to get it wrong, or find it practically too difficult to get enough water, at the right temp. to the right place at the right time. So maybe instead we should do all we can to neutralize the changes we have made in/on the earth, so we don't accidentally provoke another drastic change in temperature? Apparently the earth is good enough at doing that on its own, without our help. Maybe we can at least stop more warming, while we figure out whether we want to go into the mucking about with the climate intentionally business? And since it is likely, given all of the changes we have made to the earth, that we have changed more than just the temperature, trying to reverse the most egregious changes we have made could stop any other crazy outcomes we have not yet forseen, but in our ignorance, directed the earth toward. I'm thinking of things like acid rain. It isn't like we don't have evidence that we have drastically changed certain places/aspects of the earth already. So, in conclusion, we should clean up our messes already (air, land, and water ones), regardless of whether we have caused actual harm to the climate (yet), becuase the planet could use a good scrub down after our mucking about on it for centuries.

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Dophins and a Hero



by maria on 06.11.2009 - 21:21  

Dophins are deep thinkers.


Plus they are just so darn cute!

And a big hurrah to Sergeant Munley, who's amazing performance at the Ft. Hood shooting undoubtedly saved lives. NYTimes arcticle. Must agree with William Saletan of Slate that if women can defend Fort Hood in such a brave and heroic showing, then they should definitely be defending the USA in the military.

Image from NY Daily News

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Health Care


Politics, Health

by maria on 19.10.2009 - 02:56  

I think there are serious flaws with our (USA) health care system currently. I think all people should have basic health care, and our current system fails to do that. Not only do not all people have health insurance, but those that do can lose it when they need it most, all too easily. I believe the basic reason for this is the people who are suppose to be providing access to health care (the insurance companies) have an incentive to to NOT GIVE ACCESS TO CARE. If they give insurance to people who end up in the hospital for a long time, it costs the company lots of money, so they would rather spend the money figuring out how to not hold up their end of the bargain (usually cheaper to find a way to reject a claim/deny coverage), or spend the money figuring out how to only sell their insurance to primarily healthy people who are unlikely to cost them loads of money, not to mention advertising how great they are, to entice a large pool of people to choose the healthy people from. Oh, yes, and then there is all of the money they've been bloody spending to stop congress from changing the status quo. Hmm, wonder why they would want to keep the status quo? Their primary goal is to make money. For businesses where making the vast majority of customers happy means more business and more money and happy owners, this is okay, but when it is advantageous for a company to only keep the customers happy that do not require much, and advantageous to discourage other customers from even doing business with them, because this is what makes the most money and keeps the owners happy, this is problematic. And when it is a business that we as Americans think all people should have access to, this is doubly problematic. Medicare is successful largely because it does not have these incentives. They spend their money figuring out how to get the most people health care for the smallest costs, not in how to get out of paying for health care.

So, how to solve the problem? What about regulation? What if we say, okay, you can't deny someone coverage because of pre-existing conditions? Okay, that's easy, just charge them lots more money. Chances are they won't be able to afford it, and will still be out of insurance. So, how do you regulate a company to provide everyone who asks for it insurance at a reasonable price and force them to pay all reasonable medical bills? I don't think it is possible. I think unless you break the incentive to make money, insurance companies will find the loopholes, and continue to spend lots of money on not providing health care, and there will continue to be people without insurance and denied claims. One thing I have wondered about is what would happen if you required all health insurance companies to be non-profit. I think it probably makes more sense to have a public option, based on the medicare option, but I would not rule out the non-profit idea. I wonder if there are other solutions.

I also believe that having health care tied to your employer is a bad idea. Maybe it made more sense when people stayed with one employer for years, but I think it makes no sense today, where for years, the average person has been with their current employer for only 4.1 years As of Jan 2008. Why should we have to change insurance (and quite possibly doctors) when we change jobs? I once changed doctors four times in two years, because of various health insurance shenanigans. Not one of those times was because I was actually unhappy with my doctor. And why should health insurance be a factor when choosing a job? It seems crazy to me. I know people who hate their insurance, but can't change insurance companies because they don't want to change jobs. And, worse, I know people who have stayed in jobs they hated for years because they were afraid of losing their health insurance. It can't be good for your health... I think if there were a public option there would be less incentive for employers to use health insurance to entice people, and less incentive for people to choose jobs based on health insurance.

At any rate, I think we need to try something that is actually different then what we are doing now, and not just a couple of reforms or regulations, because what we are doing now just isn't working, and I don't believe it can be properly patched.


It appears at least some experts believe the current bill (which has no public option) could make things worse for patients LATimes Article.

</health care rant>

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Such a Ho


Politics, myLife

by maria on 10.08.2009 - 00:35  

I was hanging out with some friends recently, when they began talking about someone they knew in high school. They called her a ho. I did not call them on it. Maybe because I did not know said girl. But it should not have mattered. It really doesn't matter whether she fulfilled some criteria for being a ho. The term ho is offensive. Very. Should not be used to refer to anyone. The old double standard. It would never have even crossed their mind to care about a label for a guy from high school who slept around. I wish I would have said something. I don't understand why it took so long for the offense to even register. Why it wasn't until much later that night that I said to myself, 'wait a minute, they called some girl a ho; I should have said something'. Next time I hope my brain isn't in such slow motion.

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by maria on 27.05.2009 - 16:30  

What a struggle. Normally I post things like this in my Work directory, but I wanted people to be able to post comments, so I'm posting here. Consider it a constant work in progress, as I will continue to learn about ldap.

ldap running on port 389 can use tls or not. This is so you can do anonymous binds (as far as I can figure, there is no reason to require an encrypted connection to find out public information when not using a password). So what I want to figure out is if the ldap server can require tls for all queries that require a password. Presumably, we have already decided which ldap entries are private enough to require a password with slapd.conf ACLs.

rootdn can be used for initial setup, but best to setup a user in the database to be admin, and then get rid of rootdn.

Adding ssl start_tls to ldap.conf seems to disable anonymous binds.

test gnutls:

on server:

gnutls-serv --x509certfile /etc/ldap/certs/server.crt \
            --x509keyfile /etc/ldap/certs/server.key

on a client (needs gnutls-cli and cafile): gnutls-cli --x509cafile /etc/ssl/certs/ca-cert.crt

will give cert info:

openssl x509 -in /etc/ldap/certs/ldap.cert.pem -text -noout

test tls with ldap:

ldapsearch -x -ZZ -d 255

ldap error codes: http://www.zytrax.com/books/ldap/ch12/

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Road Trip



by me on 25.05.2009 - 23:20  

We are done with our roadtrip! Well, I'm still in California for a couple more days, but Tanika is now back in Washington. Below was our final itinerary. We had a really great time, and pictures are on the web.


The times are approximate driving times, but we found them to be pretty close.

Current tentative itinerary:

  • June 27th, AM: Fly to Salt Lake City, drive to Vernal (~3 hour drive)
  • June 28th - July 2nd Yampa River Trip
  • July 2nd - July 4th Timpanagos Cave National Monument,
  • July 4th Dinosaur museum
  • July 5th - return to Salt Lake City, Mormon Temple, David flies back to Seattle 3:10pm
  • July 5th from Salt Lake City to Bryce, 4 hrs, 2 nights
  • July 7th 2 hrs to Grand Staircase-Escalante National Monument, 3 nights
  • July 9th Capitol Reef 2 hrs, afternoon, drove on to Moab
  • July 10th Moab 2:30 hrs, 2-3 nights Arches and Canyonlands
  • July 14th Canyonlands
  • July 17th Mesa Verde 2 hrs, 1 night
  • July 18th Four Corners 1 hr
  • July 18th Monument Valley 2 hrs, 1 night
  • July 19th Page 2 hrs, 2 nights (Antelope Canyon)
  • July 21st Vermillion Cliffs 1 hr, 1 night (Buckskin Gulch)
  • July 22nd Grand Canyon 2 hrs, 1 night
  • July 23nd Zion 3 hrs, 2 nights
  • July 25th - 8 hrs to Bakersfield 2 nights (visit Pat & clan)
  • July 27th - 4:30 hrs to Bay area, hang out here and Davis rest of trip
  • July 30th - Tanika returns to Seattle from SF (6:05PM), I hang out in bay area and Davis, visit friends
  • August 5th - I return to Salt Lake City and fly home (flight is Aug. 6th 11:14AM)

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by maria on 30.04.2009 - 01:43  

Before I got married I had no intention of getting married. I got married because otherwise I had to separate from my boyfriend for a year and a half. My suspicions about marriage were confirmed, and I myself fell into a couple of marriage traps. The biggest one is complacency. We will be together no matter what, so I can let loose. Nothing like taking a relationship for granted to cause it to fall apart. It has since come to my attention that there are other reasons for complacency in relationships, but I still maintain that marriage is the biggest and baddest. The second marriage trap is the expectation. At the same time that you are starting to take the relationship for granted, your expectations of the relationship suddenly increase. Weirdly enough, not just your expectations for the other person. Suddenly you think you need to give up this or the other thing, or make some sacrifice that has never been requested, because wives do x or husbands do y. Or maybe you think you are suppose be spending time or money on something, but turns out the other person has entirely different expectations, and may not even notice you bending over backwards for something they couldn't care less about. We find ourselves acting as if there is some model that we must all follow. Some model based on fairytales and tv shows and our own baggage... Of course I thought I could get around all of this by just not marrying again. Silly me, don't know what I was thinking. Becoming a nun might have saved me from it, but that would have landed me in a padded room instead, I expect, or I would be like one of the priests photographed with a woman. Celibacy, shmelibacy.

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Email is Evil



by maria on 22.04.2009 - 01:45  

Recently I came across this blog post, The Email Problem and How to Solve it. I wouldn't say there were a whole lot of solutions presented, but it got me thinking about how much time I spend checking email. Part of the problem is that many of us are tied to email in a fundamental way for our jobs. Right now I am having problems with computers overheating, so if I am not right next to the computer room, and checking the temperature as regularly as I check my email, then I do need to be checking my email often, to make sure I am not getting an email from the server telling me, "hey, I'm overheating, do something!" My job being computer admin, there are all kinds of reasons why I have to be checking my email regularly. But it is a major distraction, and it is often difficult to get back on task after checking it. I think one solution that the author did not really touch on is to expand the tagging ability of emails and the filtering of alerts. Right now we can tag emails after we have read them as important, but other than using capital letters in the subject, it is difficult to tag an email before you send it. It would be great if I could filter my email alerts to critical sometimes, kind of like a 'do not disturb except during emergencies' sign, and only be told about servers overheating or other true emergencies when I am in the middle of some programming that takes all of my concentration. Or even creating different levels of alerts would be a good start, for example, when I am in critical work mode, I only want to know about emails from my computers and my boss.

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Ada Lovelace Day


Lovelace, Politics, Tech

by maria on 24.03.2009 - 13:42  


It has become obvious that women need to see female role models, in order to persevere and thrive in male-dominated fields. So, Suw Charman-Anderson announced that she would post a blog if 1000 other people also promised to post a blog about a woman they admire who has excelled in technology. She is calling it Ada Lovelace Day in honor of one of the world's first computer programmers.

So, I signed the pledge, and talked to my daughter Tanika about it. She told me that a woman invented the dishwasher, which I did not know, and recommended I look into that. Josephine Cochrane did invent the first workable mechanical machine to wash dishes. Apparently she had grown tired of her servants breaking her dishes, and is quoted to have said, "If nobody else is going to invent a dishwashing machine, I'll do it myself." I love it. She designed a wheel that set inside a copper boiler, and held several different compartments made of wire to hold different types of dishes. A motor turned the wheel and pumped hot soapy water from the bottom of the boiler. I love the image I have in my head of her in the early 1880's at work in the shed behind her house, hammering pieces of hardware to a copper wash-boiler. She received a patent for it in 1886, and founded the Garis-Cochran Dish-Washing Company to produce it, which later became the KitchenAid part of the Whirlpool Corporation. Another great quote: “Women are inventive, the common opinion to the contrary notwithstanding. You see, we are not given a mechanical education, and that is a great handicap. It was to me—not in the way you suppose, however. I couldn’t get men to do the things I wanted in my way until they had tried and failed in their own. And that was costly for me. They knew I knew nothing, academically, about mechanics, and they insisted on having their own way with my invention until they convinced themselves my way was the better, no matter how I had arrived at it.” Things were definitely difficult for women in the late 19th century, both as inventors and business owners, and she should be applauded as much for her bravery in getting into business as she was for the invention itself. Another quote, regarding the first sale she made, to a large hotel in Chicago, “You asked me what was the hardest part of getting into business,” Mrs. Cochrane recalled for the reporter for the Record-Herald. “That was almost the hardest thing I ever did, I think, crossing the great lobby of the Sherman House alone. You cannot imagine what it was like in those days, twenty-five years ago, for a woman to cross a hotel lobby alone. I had never been anywhere without my husband or father —the lobby seemed a mile wide. I thought I should faint at every step, but I didn’t—and I got an $800 order as my reward.”

picture and some background from Hall of Fame inventor profile
other sources:
American Heritage Profile
University of Houston profile

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by maria on 19.03.2009 - 00:41  

Since my employer does not have a charity donation program, I have been struggling to deal with donations. Mostly I've been unsuccessful, and my donations have been erratic at best. But, recently I have discovered two sites that make life easier, and my donations more consistent and thoughtful. Network for Good is a nonprofit that is set up to distribute donations to other nonprofits. They make it very easy to make regular donations to charities you like. The other useful web site is Charity Navigator. This web site makes it easy to see how well charities do at being charities, so you can somewhat objectively narrow down which charities you want to donate to. Charity Navigator is itself a nonprofit, but does not accept funding from the charities it evaluates. Here I discovered that two the organizations I have been supporting are vastly different in their use of funds. Heifer International is not nearly as efficient as Mercy Corps, and I have decided that for now it makes sense to send more money to Mercy Corps than to send each less money. There is another nonprofit that has recently come to my attention. It is not listed in Charity Navigator, and I think that is because of its unique status. It is Kiva, and it is currently the only nonprofit international microlender. So you don't really donate (although you get the opportunity to donate to Kiva itself when you lend money), but give loans to people. You get to choose the people you loan to from a bunch of selected entrepreneurs, and can loan amounts as small as $25. When your loan is paid back (and it appears that most of them are, but there is some risk that they won't be, of course), you have the opportunity to re-invest, donate to Kiva, or pull your money. You do not receive interest for the loans (and neither does Kiva).

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by maria on 07.02.2009 - 23:21  

I'm with the the Stranger Slog on this one. Pot smoking should not be illegal, and Phelps should not be apologizing for smoking it. I love this quote "Here is the implication the swimming team makes and Phelps's apology upholds: if you smoke pot, you can't grow up to be a great athlete, star, success, etc. Well-lo and fucking behold-you can." Not only that, but whoever heard of anyone dying from smoking too much pot? I think that makes it a safer bet than alcohol (the total number of deaths with any mention of alcohol poisoning is 1,393 per year), possibly even safer then gambling (and certainly less likely to ruin you financially). We waste a bunch of money and resources chasing down pot smokers, when we could be making money off taxation of it, as we do with so many other vices. Not that I am trying to say that pot smoking doesn't have negative effects, of course, it does. But, if we are going to allow vices that do marginal harm, then it seems to me that marijuana is a great candidate, and making it illegal hasn't done much of anything towards making it less harmful. Another good quote from the slog, "About one-third of the country has smoked pot, and those stoners who act like it's a sin are part of the reason we're so reluctant to fix pot laws". Now, where are those corn flakes?

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Dangerous Attitudes


Politics, Science

by maria on 16.01.2009 - 22:10  

From the attack on Matthew Shepard and many others we learned how it can be dangerous, and even deadly, to be gay. Now it is becoming clear that this danger isn't just from the hate crimes of bigots. A new study has linked suicide attempts, riskier sexual behavior and higher drug use to gay adults whose families rejected them compared to gay adults whose families were accepting of them. True, correlation does not prove causation, and better studies should be designed and carried out, but in this case, I think it is a fair assumption that the rejection played a role in the increased numbers. After all, it doesn't seem crazy to assume that someone rejected by a parent, for any reason, would be more depressed as an adult. I find this so incredibly sad. These parents can't or won't recognize that their prejudices are literally hurting their children, and setting them up to be unnecessarily more miserable in their adulthood. This is why I believe our society's attitude towards gay marriage is not just immoral, but dangerous. Some may say that we can be accepting of gays and gay relationships, and still not allow gay marriages, but I believe this is equivalent to saying we can believe that women and men are equal, but still require women to stay barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen. Wrong, wrong, wrong. As long as we are saying, one must do something or cannot do something based solely on one's race, sex, ethnicity, sexual orientation, etc. we are being prejudiced, and furthermore, we are endangering people by promoting prejudice. I think the links found in this study should really have been already somewhat obvious (like I said earlier, who doesn't believe that a child rejected by a parent, for any reason, is more likely to be depressed as an adult), but I understand not being able to see the forest for the trees, and I hope that having studies that confirm what many of us were suspicious of already will help to change attitudes. One can hope.

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The battle to marry *


Politics, Science, Religion

by maria on 29.12.2008 - 22:57  

It has been a while since I have posted anything. November and December sort of blindsided me. Lots going on. Somehow between dealing with craziness, ;-) I did run across an interesting article about the question of whether sexual orientation is a lifestyle choice or a biological trait. The article compares sexual orientation to handedness, and it seems a very apt comparison, and makes very good arguments as to why sexual orientation is a biological trait. I assumed that this would be the end of the story, but recently I was part of a discussion with a person from the religious right persuasion, who thinks that even if sexual orientation is a biological trait, and even if there is nothing a person can do about which sex they are attracted to, practicing homosexuality is still a sin. Apparently, according to her church, some people are unlucky enough to be born having to fight their sexual urges their entire lives. I can sort of see the logic, I mean I guess there are people who have an urge to murder people, and they probably have to fight this urge their whole life. But, murderers are clearly infringing on other people's right to life, if they give in to their urge, and consenting homosexual adults are clearly not. And on the more common end of the comparison spectrum, it seems to me a bit more intense then say, a married person having to battle wanting to cheat on their spouses occasionally (adultery, interestingly enough, is illegal in about 20 states, according to myfamilylaw.com, and is arguably infringing on the spouses rights). According to this church, it seems some people are given homosexuality as their cross to bear. I'm guessing there aren't a whole lot of gay men and women in her church. But the worse bit is that apparently she is obligated by her religion to push for legislation against giving gay people the right to marry each other. So, it isn't just wrong for her, and people with the same beliefs that she has, but it is also wrong for people who worship the flying spaghetti monster. While I can see where this argument comes from, it just seems a bit ridiculous to me. My first hurdle is getting past my 'if it isn't infringing on someone else's rights, then leave well enough alone' tendency. And then, I just completely don't understand the leap from, 'my religion states that this is wrong so I shouldn't do it' to 'I must do what I can to make sure this becomes against the law'. Is there going to be legislation soon that we cannot work on Sundays or that we aren't allowed to eat pork?

  • I did amuse myself with this title, which if I were talking about myself, would have been titled the battle not to marry.

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A New Day



by maria on 05.11.2008 - 11:56  

It is a great day to be an American. 43 years after the Voting Rights Act was passed outlawing discriminating voting practices that were often used to prevent blacks from voting, we have elected a black president. 40 years after Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. was shot for having a noble and inspiring dream, we are one giant step closer to seeing that dream fulfilled.

I want to thank Barack Obama. He has given me hope. Hope that this country can overcome its prejudices. Hope that we can become a great nation. A nation that helps to promote peace and justice. A nation that helps to make this world a better place to live in. Hope that we can work together to get things done, instead of calling each other names. Imagine people doing things because it is the right thing to do, instead of because we are scared and threatened. Hope that we can change the world by teaching, instead of by bullying. And hope that we stop torturing and having our civil rights stolen and trampled upon. Hope that science will once again be used to inform policy, instead of policy being used to manipulate science. Hope that we can clean up our messes, and educate our children more effectively. Hope for a better future and cleaner world for our children. Maybe that is a lot of hope to put on one man, but like Barack says, all of this happened because of us, and we can work with him to make the rest of these dreams come true as well.

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Bobbie Hort



by Maria on 22.10.2008 - 01:26  

Bobbie and Harold Hort
Bobbie and Harold Hort

My aunt died a few days ago. It was not unexpected, as her health was poor, but it was still too soon. I had hoped to visit her again before she passed, but it seems I waited too long. I hope she knew how much I loved and appreciated her. We never lived very near each other, but I always enjoyed visiting her. I always thought it was quite special that my daughter was born on the same day as Bobbie, November 14.

I left for the army when I was just 17 years old, and after training I was stationed in Korea for a year. I then moved to Fort Hood, Texas. I lived there for two and a half years, and the only person from my family that ever visited me there was Bobbie, who came down from Nebraska and stayed with us for a few days. I was so grateful to have that contact, as my time in the army was far from easy.

Thank you Bobbie.

Bobbie's old farm holds so many wonderful memories for me. When I was young, playing on the farm, surrounded by family and animals, was like a little piece of heaven. Until my brother and I discovered that red ants bite. Being city folks, the farm was an infinite source of new intrigues. Bobbie is always central to that memory. She always had a fun story and words of wisdom. Not to mention a bit of candy.

Thank you Bobbie.

She was an inspiration. First woman firefighter in the state of Nebraska. I remember learning that and thinking how cool, that's my aunt. She weathered some mighty storms, and helped others to weather theirs.

Thank you Bobbie.

It is very unfortunate that I don't believe I ever told her these things. I hope she knew that she was an inspiration to me, that I very much appreciated having her as an aunt, and that I love her and will miss her.

I have posted some pictures.

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Video War


Politics, Charities

by Maria on 05.09.2008 - 01:26  

I read this article and this one in Slate a while back, and they have been needling me ever since. The articles are about drones that the military uses. They are remote controlled weapons. The military has worked with video game technicians and programmers to make the experience, well, more video game-like. I find this concept so much more scary than cloning or gene therapy or any of the other 'scary' technologies that are currently being explored. How can anyone understand the ramifications of what they are doing, if killing just looks like a video game?

Both articles brings up lots of good points about how scary it is to have combat military that doesn't truly see the damage that it is doing, so I won't go into that, except for one point. Since other countries are developing the same technology, it seems that future wars could be fought by people that are hidden away in various locations, while the countries at war are blown to smithereens. And to the people fighting, it will all be video images.

But here is some more food for thought:

I have no idea what the range of these things are currently, but one can imagine that it won't take too long before they can be very long range. And if they aren't already small enough to go undetected by radar, one can also imagine that not being far away. The damage that a terrorist could do with a drone, once the range is large and the size is small, would be incredible. And, it is hard to imagine any border control that could do much about it.

I realize that we will never get rid of terrorism completely, but clearly we need to start really dealing with the breeding grounds, and the rampant growth of terrorism. We need to attack the root causes of people choosing to become terrorists, because the weapons that they can get a hold of are only going to get more sophisticated and scary. According to one of the Slate articles France, Germany, Greece, India, the Philippines, Russia, even Switzerland are all building or buying drones; soon enough, someone will start selling them to terrorists. I think Greg Mortenson (Three Cups of Tea) is on the right track, and I would encourage everyone to donate whatever they can to help his organization, the Central Asia Institute. It is imperative that we do all in our power to promote peace, so I hope that everyone reading this will take a look at his work. From the CAI website: "The best hope for a peaceful and prosperous world lies in the education of all the world's children."

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Global Warming


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West Coast Trail


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Obama ~ Comments: 0

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Choice ~ Comments: 0

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eleven ~ Comments: 1

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living where I walk


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the killing fields


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Girls finish last


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Cool new toy


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emergence ~ Comments: 2

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GI Bill


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Tanika's poem for Ella


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Phone Scam


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Children's Hospital


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christian god


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Uganda ~ Comments: 0

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geeking out


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Can I piss you off? Or give you compost?


Can I piss you off? Or give you compost? ~ Comments: 0

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so this is blogging


Is this bloody working yet?


Is this bloody working yet? ~ Comments: 8

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